Next steps for wife

[getwifetopplay]

We been Married 20 years I was ny wife first and only lover. Very Vanillia wife. Over the years I been wanting her to open up. I don;t know why but I want her to try other men. I just want her to let loose and go wild.

Over the years I defiantly go her more into things. She openly jokes about sleeping with other guys. if I push her a bit she covers it up as just a joke. We never get into a serious conversation to actually talk about it.

About 2 years ago I started buying vibrators for her. She was much more accepting but she was shy. I started to buy bigger ones but she was not comfortable using them However last week she ask me to use them for the first time and just let loose with it.

I think watching porn would be a good next step but she is super shy when ever I watch it. I haven't pushed watching but wonder if this would be a good next step.

My goal is watch her fuck other guys and have a MFM with her and really not sure how to bring this up since she still pretty shy.

 

[wormwood]

Next time she openly jokes about sleeping with other guys, try asking her which guys. I know I got a lot of mileage out of asking my wife about the kind of guys she's attracted to. Once you've got that info, try to find a male porn star that fits her desires. Tell her that you've found just the guy for her and sit down with her to enjoy the show.

 

[getwifetopplay]

Update. I brought a few new realistic dildo's and she took to them with no issues. Grabbed them without any hesitation. She is also hornier than ever and want me to jump her a few times a day . Not complaining but it almost too much sex at this point.

Usually I just surprise her when I want to try new things she is always into it. I think she enjoys me taking charge. The joking part tells she wants the same thing. The issue I am having is she doesn't want to talk about fantasies when she isn't in the middle of sex.

She comes from a very conservative and religious background so I think she just shy.

 

[jaandaj]

Update. I brought a few new realistic dildo's and she took to them with no issues. Grabbed them without any hesitation. She is also hornier than ever and want me to jump her a few times a day . Not complaining but it almost too much sex at this point.

Usually I just surprise her when I want to try new things she is always into it. I think she enjoys me taking charge. The joking part tells she wants the same thing. The issue I am having is she doesn't want to talk about fantasies when she isn't in the middle of sex.

She comes from a very conservative and religious background so I think she just shy.

Talk about it during sex while she is horny. U can tell by her body language if she is getting into it. 20 years of marriage and you two should know each other fairly well. Sure she is shy, but it's there obviously. Take the steps and tell her what u want and tell her it's ok if she wants it. She doesn't want to fuck up the trust u two have. She is scared what could happen. Till you can openly discuss with her what u want and what she is willing to try it will never go further.
Far as we know she is doing it with another guy behind ur back and scared to tell u!

 

[Chewbacca]

What worked for us? Same as you, long time married but in a vanilla relationship, but I had this burning fantasy of my wife fucking other well hung guys. Wasn't going to happen until we stumbled upon role-playing my wife being a hot wife, me the cuck, and also me the bull sometimes.
If she is OK with playing with realistic didlos in front mom you you are already half way there.
Someone here suggested this book called THE FAITHFUL HOTWIFE from Amazon and it really got things going. It's full of fun challenges for your wife and you to perform so it's more like a game for her so there is no pressure on her.
Let me know how it goes.
Anyone else using this book?

 

[Ht805cpl]

lots of good advice has been posted here, I am a wife who was persuaded into the swing lifestyle a very long time ago. It started usually with talk when we were in bed about sex and things each of us had done and suggestions as what about this or what about doing that, yes we watched some porn, men seem to be into it, I am not so sure women are as much, but I'd watch and it always made me wet and want to fuck, but just lots of talk about what about this and that, from swapping with another couple to nudity or exposing myself to others, I finally agreed to the swap concept, took some time to make it happen, but once it got started you could not turn me off. be careful what you wish for.

 

[NEWBIEHotwife]

What worked for us? Same as you, long time married but in a vanilla relationship, but I had this burning fantasy of my wife fucking other well hung guys. Wasn't going to happen until we stumbled upon role-playing my wife being a hot wife, me the cuck, and also me the bull sometimes.
If she is OK with playing with realistic didlos in front mom you you are already half way there.
Someone here suggested this book called THE FAITHFUL HOTWIFE from Amazon and it really got things going. It's full of fun challenges for your wife and you to perform so it's more like a game for her so there is no pressure on her.
Let me know how it goes.
Anyone else using this book?

1000% right on... at least for me and my hubby.
For me, i needed the independent book challenges and instructions- not coming from my hubby but from a woman therapist..... it became a kinky game. And now I'm a hotwife with a cuckold hubby.... who has a little male chastity in his future. Lol

 

[getwifetopplay]

Ok she loves fucking with the dildos and she now talking openly about other guys to me. She told me she like how I react to it.

However when i bring up the fact she may want to go for it she just says that is weird and shuts down.

Seems to me she wants to do it but still afraid to talk about it.

 

[Ht805cpl]

Ok she loves fucking with the dildos and she now talking openly about other guys to me. She told me she like how I react to it.

However when i bring up the fact she may want to go for it she just says that is weird and shuts down.

Seems to me she wants to do it but still afraid to talk about it.

perhaps you need to encourage her more always insuring her that you are ok with it, just be sure you can handle it when she makes the plunge, there may be no turning back. My man talked me into it, and at first it was with another woman, and she taught me all about bi sex with a woman and other women, and I loved it, and my man enjoyed the show and getting to play with so many women with me, but when he finally brought home a black man to play with me, well I went wild, my man loved the show and they shared me all night long but it wasn''t long before I was asking for him to come back over, and soon he was coming over when my man was not home, I was wild for his big black dick, and he would fuck me for hours, when My man found out how much I was fucking his black friend, he got pissed, but in time he came to accept it that his wife was a black cock whore and I needed it, and his friend was bringing over other black men to fuck me several times a week. It took him over a year to get used to it, and our life was never the same. be careful for what you ask your wife to do, but she will do it if you keep encouraging her that it will be fun and you are all in.

 

[getwifetopplay]

perhaps you need to encourage her more always insuring her that you are ok with it, just be sure you can handle it when she makes the plunge, there may be no turning back. My man talked me into it, and at first it was with another woman, and she taught me all about bi sex with a woman and other women, and I loved it, and my man enjoyed the show and getting to play with so many women with me, but when he finally brought home a black man to play with me, well I went wild, my man loved the show and they shared me all night long but it wasn''t long before I was asking for him to come back over, and soon he was coming over when my man was not home, I was wild for his big black dick, and he would fuck me for hours, when My man found out how much I was fucking his black friend, he got pissed, but in time he came to accept it that his wife was a black cock whore and I needed it, and his friend was bringing over other black men to fuck me several times a week. It took him over a year to get used to it, and our life was never the same. be careful for what you ask your wife to do, but she will do it if you keep encouraging her that it will be fun and you are all in.

I have thought about this a lot I want her to fuck other guys. How horney she become latley it would be a relief for me.

She was virgin when I met her and just turned 30 before she had sex with me. To say she was a shy is a inderstatment. However she opened up a lot over the years.


I do think that maybe swinging with another couple might be a better way to start off. I however think have mutlple guys fits better with mine and her desires.

 

[Ht805cpl]

I have thought about this a lot I want her to fuck other guys. How horney she become latley it would be a relief for me.

She was virgin when I met her and just turned 30 before she had sex with me. To say she was a shy is a inderstatment. However she opened up a lot over the years.


I do think that maybe swinging with another couple might be a better way to start off. I however think have mutlple guys fits better with mine and her desires.

well we all start some way. When we first talk about it we planned to be with another couple, but the guy backed out but the wife wanted to play, she was bi and taught me all about sex with women, we had a great time with her and many of her lady friends, when I finally asked when we would try a couple or a guy, he found a friend he knew and hung out with, and he brought him home, like I said he was a black guy very well hung and I loved the way he fucked me, and in time he brought other black guys to fuck me, I became their day time hot fuck, and when My husband was home they could come at night and he and them would fuck me all night long. it was very hot, not long after that we got involved with some other couples and into so groups, finally the clubs and sex parties, but when ever I was going to be with just a man it was always a black man, or men, at clubs or parties I would fuck with anyone, male or female but he unleashed the wild side of me, to the point he had to accept it, I was a over sexy woman and needed it all the time, took him a few years to get used to it, but today we are very happy together, and we have a great sex life together and with others. I hope you find the way to bring her over the first time. I think after that it will be wild for you both.

 

[getwifetopplay]

well we all start some way. When we first talk about it we planned to be with another couple, but the guy backed out but the wife wanted to play, she was bi and taught me all about sex with women, we had a great time with her and many of her lady friends, when I finally asked when we would try a couple or a guy, he found a friend he knew and hung out with, and he brought him home, like I said he was a black guy very well hung and I loved the way he fucked me, and in time he brought other black guys to fuck me, I became their day time hot fuck, and when My husband was home they could come at night and he and them would fuck me all night long. it was very hot, not long after that we got involved with some other couples and into so groups, finally the clubs and sex parties, but when ever I was going to be with just a man it was always a black man, or men, at clubs or parties I would fuck with anyone, male or female but he unleashed the wild side of me, to the point he had to accept it, I was a over sexy woman and needed it all the time, took him a few years to get used to it, but today we are very happy together, and we have a great sex life together and with others. I hope you find the way to bring her over the first time. I think after that it will be wild for you both.

So what was the trigger that finally made you cross over. Is there is any reason to think if she is joking about and willing to use toys that she eventually warm up to things. I know it possible but it it would nice to hear how others progressed.

 

[getwifetopplay]

I guess this is progress. My wife basically is talking about a famous guy that she has the hots for she openly talking about it. Not sure if his normal and if I am getting close to my wish.

 

[Ht805cpl]

I guess this is progress. My wife basically is talking about a famous guy that she has the hots for she openly talking about it. Not sure if his normal and if I am getting close to my wish.

We have talked back and forth, I would think if she is talking about a guy she thinks is hot or willing to think about perhaps she is opening up, if you like feel free to Message me here and we can talk in depth or I will share and answer any questions about my start!

 

[WantToWatchWife]

I guess this is progress. My wife basically is talking about a famous guy that she has the hots for she openly talking about it. Not sure if his normal and if I am getting close to my wish.

Good luck with your wife. I told my wife 3 years ago that I would love to see her enjoy other men since she's only had sex with 2 men in her life. She has gotten into our role-play using her dildo to the point she has continuous orgasms while I'm using her dildo on her, she even gave her dildo a name. While she openly lusts after Jason Momoa and Orlando Bloom, she doesn't mention them during our play. As I said even though she really gets off on our role-play she still tells me no when I ask her if she wants to find a real lover.

 

[Ht805cpl]

Good luck with your wife. I told my wife 3 years ago that I would love to see her enjoy other men since she's only had sex with 2 men in her life. She has gotten into our role-play using her dildo to the point she has continuous orgasms while I'm using her dildo on her, she even gave her dildo a name. While she openly lusts after Jason Momoa and Orlando Bloom, she doesn't mention them during our play. As I said even though she really gets off on our role-play she still tells me no when I ask her if she wants to find a real lover.

Perhaps ask about attending a swing party or club. There is no Pressure to play you can mingle or observe, in fact our experiences is there more people not playing as those who are depending on the event

 

[Ht805cpl]

Good luck with your wife. I told my wife 3 years ago that I would love to see her enjoy other men since she's only had sex with 2 men in her life. She has gotten into our role-play using her dildo to the point she has continuous orgasms while I'm using her dildo on her, she even gave her dildo a name. While she openly lusts after Jason Momoa and Orlando Bloom, she doesn't mention them during our play. As I said even though she really gets off on our role-play she still tells me no when I ask her if she wants to find a real lover.

Perhaps ask about attending a swing party or club. There is no Pressure to play you can mingle or observe, in fact our experiences is there more people not playing as those who are depending on the event

 

[WantToWatchWife]

Perhaps ask about attending a swing party or club. There is no Pressure to play you can mingle or observe, in fact our experiences is there more people not playing as those who are depending on the event

I don't think mentioning a swing party would be a good idea because when I first told her about wanting her to experience another man she asked if I wanted sex with another woman. It took me a while to convince her that I wasn't interested in being with another woman. I think what is holding her back the most is her issues with her body and self-worth, she was mentally abused by her mother and her first husband.

 

[getwifetopplay]

I don't think mentioning a swing party would be a good idea because when I first told her about wanting her to experience another man she asked if I wanted sex with another woman. It took me a while to convince her that I wasn't interested in being with another woman. I think what is holding her back the most is her issues with her body and self-worth, she was mentally abused by her mother and her first husband.

If she is role playing and talking about it in a not so serious manner like my wife you know deep down they enjoy the thought of having other guys. It's not a small step going from fantasy to actually doing it. If they were against it you wouldn't be talking about at all.

Not sure about everyone else but getting up the nerve to talk to her in a serious manner is hard. From. reading and the reponses on here I come to understanding that there is a process I need to go though and so does my wife.

I have come up with a list that I think a lot people go though on the path. Maybe someone with experience can add or improve it.

1). Learning that hotwife exists - Most people are shocked this really happens
2) Curiosity and Fantasy - Start watching porn maybe even daydream
3) open about hotwife lifestyle - The initial conversations happen usually but never go anywhere
4) Turned on Stage - When you think about your turned on and you openly joke about and role-play or act out during sex.
5). Acceptance - You wife and you agree and she starts fucking other guys.

I don't think you can have a set time for moving though stages and for some it may be quick while others will take years. Personally I think I am stage 4 with wife. From what I can tell step 5 is not that far away and just need to let it happen naturally.

The other thing is I come to the conclusion the wife has to be accepting that you will fuck other women as well. You may not act on this but a wife willing to let her guy fuck is also going to be able to fuck other guys freely and without guilt.

 

[Ht805cpl]

I don't think mentioning a swing party would be a good idea because when I first told her about wanting her to experience another man she asked if I wanted sex with another woman. It took me a while to convince her that I wasn't interested in being with another woman. I think what is holding her back the most is her issues with her body and self-worth, she was mentally abused by her mother and her first husband.

If you like to talk a bit more in depth message me on this subject, there is no right and wrong way but I disagree with your idea of swing parties, or the interest of she can and you can’t it can all work out in what ever way you desire. If you are serious in your questions I’d be happy to chat with you in private.