She's cheated on me

Yes it is the fact that people will always know even if nothing is ever said, the humiliation burns.
unlike your wife mine hasn’t saId people know, but I am pretty certain that is the case, and they must have covered for her.
She has admitted one occasion when I dropped her off and picked her up late night from the station, she had gone to his, not to one of her female friends from work.
What was yours thinking fucking unprotected, was she on the pill?
I have said a lot about this guy, but when I was asking her about that first drunken time, I questioned if he had used a condom, she said no. I questioned if he asked if she was protected and the answer was he didnt. It seems that any consequence wasn’t his problem
it is the total mindfuck and changing moods and emotions I am currently struggling with. Humiliation is winning out right now.
I agree , others must be in the loop so that shows you as well what her friends are like and not to be trusted either - that’s what I meant about the phone and the no / names - mines had her guys in as her sisters son !! . I would not welcome any humiliation in regards to cuckolding but each to there own , guaranteed people at work know too especially now it’s supposed to be over - nothing to stop stud to talk about his latest married conquest eh - so maybe even some co worker may cover for her at this works do - so you have everyone in her trusted circle aware of her and him - only one left out should have been no1 in her trusted circle - you . Just keep in mind you wanted to make it an experience you both could share and enjoy , but she decided to go solo for 6 months !! Where was the trust and respect there , just to be latest married notch on stud boys bedpost . She was happy you were totally unaware while she was getting shagged stupid
 
I agree , others must be in the loop so that shows you as well what her friends are like and not to be trusted either - that’s what I meant about the phone and the no / names - mines had her guys in as her sisters son !! . I would not welcome any humiliation in regards to cuckolding but each to there own , guaranteed people at work know too especially now it’s supposed to be over - nothing to stop stud to talk about his latest married conquest eh - so maybe even some co worker may cover for her at this works do - so you have everyone in her trusted circle aware of her and him - only one left out should have been no1 in her trusted circle - you . Just keep in mind you wanted to make it an experience you both could share and enjoy , but she decided to go solo for 6 months !! Where was the trust and respect there , just to be latest married notch on stud boys bedpost . She was happy you were totally unaware while she was getting shagged stupid
I have been keeping an eye but she is on best behaviour.
Yes I would imagine he would talk regardless of who dumped who.
It was a very strange choice for her to make going it alone.
One things for sure if we do get past this, there will not be anymore 'I like the fantasy bit can't do it for real'!
 
I have been keeping an eye but she is on best behaviour.
Yes I would imagine he would talk regardless of who dumped who.
It was a very strange choice for her to make going it alone.
One things for sure if we do get past this, there will not be anymore 'I like the fantasy bit can't do it for real'!
Yes but you probably would be too be a good boy , yes funny how just one wrong turn can fuck you right up - still don’t understand why she just didn’t contact you in some way for the green light that first time ? - maybe it was because you didn’t like him and she knew it but that’s all the more reason not to keep seeing him ??? - yes reality is a bummer eh - keep an open mind however
 
Yes but you probably would be too be a good boy , yes funny how just one wrong turn can fuck you right up - still don’t understand why she just didn’t contact you in some way for the green light that first time ? - maybe it was because you didn’t like him and she knew it but that’s all the more reason not to keep seeing him ??? - yes reality is a bummer eh - keep an open mind however
I think perhaps what we talked about was a smoke screen, she wanted him or he seduced her and it probably would have happened anyway. Telling me would have confined it to a fuck
 
I am new here, don't even know if I am posting this in the right place.

A couple of months ago my wife out of the blue confessed to having an affair, which she apparently ended.

I have been upset and angry but also very weirdly turned on by it.

I am hurt and angry that she could do this to me.

But I am turned on by the fact that she could do it and I can't help imagining them doing it.

I have no one to confide in or discuss this with.
Can chat with me. I had the same happen to me. I had no one to talk to was not nice
 
I think perhaps what we talked about was a smoke screen, she wanted him or he seduced her and it probably would have happened anyway. Telling me would have confined it to a fuck
Probably 50/50 then and yes she be trying constantly to reduce the type / amount etc of sex they had to lessen the blow and impact - not for you though , for her . Well I wouldn’t be thinking like that about it probably would have - was her choice to take her knickers off for him - again you wanted some sort of say / involvement but your fantasy / feelings were not a second thought - how much easier would have been for you both if it was just confined to a fuck .
 
Probably 50/50 then and yes she be trying constantly to reduce the type / amount etc of sex they had to lessen the blow and impact - not for you though , for her . Well I wouldn’t be thinking like that about it probably would have - was her choice to take her knickers off for him - again you wanted some sort of say / involvement but your fantasy / feelings were not a second thought - how much easier would have been for you both if it was just confined to a fuck .
That is why I think my fantasy had little to do with it. I would have without been easier on us both if she had been upfront but I don't think that was in her mind. Whoever made the first move, this is something she must have wanted and there was more to, with clandestine meetings, lifts home, sneaking around and obviously at some point feelings,
 
That is why I think my fantasy had little to do with it. I would have without been easier on us both if she had been upfront but I don't think that was in her mind. Whoever made the first move, this is something she must have wanted and there was more to, with clandestine meetings, lifts home, sneaking around and obviously at some point feelings,
Yes I agree , maybe she was thinking of using the fantasy in reserve in case it went tits up . Yes or why else pursue to knowingly go behind your back and yes the most dangerous of all feelings - was ten times worse for me to deal with as in a recording I overheard my loving wife who went crazy about me even suggesting to share her and sex is only between msn and wife etc etc - openly telling her scum bag that he was her ‘ one ‘ . Least yours owned up ( or had to before someone else did or let something slip )
 
Yes I agree , maybe she was thinking of using the fantasy in reserve in case it went tits up . Yes or why else pursue to knowingly go behind your back and yes the most dangerous of all feelings - was ten times worse for me to deal with as in a recording I overheard my loving wife who went crazy about me even suggesting to share her and sex is only between msn and wife etc etc - openly telling her scum bag that he was her ‘ one ‘ . Least yours owned up ( or had to before someone else did or let something slip )
That must have been brutal to hear
 
That must have been brutal to hear
Yes really was and to make it even worse her daughter of 27 and lives with us 😕👎 knew about it and was ok with it !! . So as you can imagine after hearing that lot and confronting her I was raging and ripped up our wedding photos in front of her - we did eventually make it up but I was on a tightrope for weeks just wanting to throw them both into the street - time heals I suppose but I’m always on full alert and anything even minuscule and it’s sayonara for keeps . As I say time is a great healer but trust may not ever come back - I was same as you ( still am lol ) and wanted to share her , she went along with it to a point to trick me then reverted to sex is only between man / wife crap - but in the past she’s fucked her boss and her sisters guy so work that lot out ??? I can’t
 
So that is why I really relate to your situation - it wasn’t my wife fucking that was the issue - she was aware of my interest - she said she would never do such a thing or try swinging etc but the goes behind my back with the guy she knew I despised - told me I was the dirty bastard etc for even suggesting to share her ( her words ) but then does that WTF eh
 
I'm going to be VERY DIRECT and unfiltered and I DO NOT wish to offend you, I just offer a very COLD version of what I believe is the truth here. If I cause offense, I apologize and will refrain from further commentary on the topic.

I'm not looking for conflict here at all and I know you've both gotten what you consider are mixed messages from my post. Let me make this comment. To ALL of you guys who want this and are ENCOURAGING your wives to have sex with other men. ABOVE is EXACTLY what I have warned you about and predicted. You encouraged her to fuck other guys but she did so on HER terms, exactly as I've told you countless times on this forum could happen. Once you found out, you didn't react positively or stay cool about it, you GOT ANGRY. Now I read about possible divorce in the future. THIS!! I've told you that you can't express anger or jealousy in these circumstances but you did anyway. SURE, you are angry jealous, humiliated, etc. That IS part of this lifestyle. The trouble is my oft stated Rule Number 1) Preserve your primary relationship at all cost, has been ignored.

So, from her perspective, YOU encouraged it, SHE did it HER WAY, and you didn't like that at all. Now, not only do you want her to quit, you've embarrassed her, humiliated her, gotten her into something she never wanted to be into in the first place (most likely) and YOU have brought chaos down on your relationship to the point of losing it. Do you understand this? YOU are to blame, right?

No wonder she's pissed off and angry, dismissive now, etc. She did this, she enjoyed it and she most likely would have enjoyed continuing to do it. But, you stepped in doing everything I've warned you not to do. You really have no excuses in this, as I've said before. Each is clearly embarrassed and has quit their activity. IT"S NEVER COMING BACK! At least not on your terms. If you're lucky, you will let all of this fantasy go now and focus on repairing your relationship, letting her know that you don't blame her and that none of this is her fault. That you understand how it happened, that the experience and lifestyle just isn't right for your relationship and that you should just move on with a normal marriage. Continuing to discuss this or to follow up on all of your suspicions is going to destroy the chances you have of preserving what remains of your marriage.

By the way, so what if her daughter knew about it or other people know about it? That's exactly how it goes, she gets excited, perhaps tells a few close confidants and that's it. Of course her close confidants or going to be pissed off at you when you make her life miserable over this whole thing, and it's a thing that as of now she wishes she had NEVER gotten involved in. By the way, YOU are on THIS SITE discussing this just as she discussed it with her close confidants. She needed that, just like you do.

I know you don't want my advice, but just in case, simply LEAVE HER ALONE over this and let her heal. Stop with the snooping, let her know it's all going to be ok and move on.

I'm going to hit this point also, because you'd better be able to deal with it (and I've also stated this, many times on this site). You can never go back. Other men know the excitement your wife feels when she's filled with sexual desire, how her face looks and her voice changes when she's turned on. They know how her kisses taste and how her lips feel pleasuring their cocks. They know how her pussy tastes and feels and they know the sounds she makes when she craves not yours, but THEIR cocks inside of them. They know what it's like to give her that pleasure, they know the taste of her pussy and the feel of their bare cocks in her pussy and they know the feeling of "unloading their balls" (to use the term so many guys like to use to describe it) inside of your wife. And they've done it over and over. In some cases, other guys have done the same.

Now, you can channel that into some sort of "greatest hits" jackoff material for yourself and call it good and just put the negative feelings you have into the back of your mind. Or, you can obsess over this even further and live the reality of a fantasy gone bad and let it eat you up. I don't know if Mr Hw can help you with how to accomplish any of this, but he went down a different path with me, and I was just as bad or worse as either of your wives during my "cheating years". He just handled it completely differently and I think he's discussed that on the site as well.

As I stated, I don't wish to cause conflict or confusion, I simply wish to help you two out of it and offer this as a warning to the other guys on the site who don't fully grasp the consequences of that which they desire. I really hope I'm not called names or some sort of "Fem Dom Bitch" again over this because that is not my intent or feeling at all.

I wish you both the best of luck and if I've misinterpreted this long running drama then I'm truly sorry.

Mrs Hotwife
 
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So that is why I really relate to your situation - it wasn’t my wife fucking that was the issue - she was aware of my interest - she said she would never do such a thing or try swinging etc but the goes behind my back with the guy she knew I despised - told me I was the dirty bastard etc for even suggesting to share her ( her words ) but then does that WTF eh
Mine has always been kind hearted, loving, as well as sexy. She has always had attention from boys, and kind of gives off a flirt vibe without consciously knowing it. She was not the kind to openly flirt but she just has a face and body that men love
 
I'm going to be VERY DIRECT and unfiltered and I DO NOT wish to offend you, I just offer a very COLD version of what I believe is the truth here. If I cause offense, I apologize and will refrain from further commentary on the topic.

I'm not looking for conflict here at all and I know you've both gotten what you consider are mixed messages from my post. Let me make this comment. To ALL of you guys who want this and are ENCOURAGING your wives to have sex with other men. ABOVE is EXACTLY what I have warned you about and predicted. You encouraged her to fuck other guys but she did so on HER terms, exactly as I've told you countless times on this forum could happen. Once you found out, you didn't react positively or stay cool about it, you GOT ANGRY. Now I read about possible divorce in the future. THIS!! I've told you that you can't express anger or jealousy in these circumstances but you did anyway. SURE, you are angry jealous, humiliated, etc. That IS part of this lifestyle. The trouble is my oft stated Rule Number 1) Preserve your primary relationship at all cost, has been ignored.

So, from her perspective, YOU encouraged it, SHE did it HER WAY, and you didn't like that at all. Now, not only do you want her to quit, you've embarrassed her, humiliated her, gotten her into something she never wanted to be into in the first place (most likely) and YOU have brought chaos down on your relationship to the point of losing it. Do you understand this? YOU are to blame, right?

No wonder she's pissed off and angry, dismissive now, etc. She did this, she enjoyed it and she most likely would have enjoyed continuing to do it. But, you stepped in doing everything I've warned you not to do. You really have no excuses in this, as I've said before. Each is clearly embarrassed and has quit their activity. IT"S NEVER COMING BACK! At least not on your terms. If you're lucky, you will let all of this fantasy go now and focus on repairing your relationship, letting her know that you don't blame her and that none of this is her fault. That you understand how it happened, that the experience and lifestyle just isn't right for your relationship and that you should just move on with a normal marriage. Continuing to discuss this or to follow up on all of your suspicions is going to destroy the chances you have of preserving what remains of your marriage.

By the way, so what if her daughter knew about it or other people know about it? That's exactly how it goes, she gets excited, perhaps tells a few close confidants and that's it. Of course her close confidants or going to be pissed off at you when you make her life miserable over this whole thing, and it's a thing that as of now she wishes she had NEVER gotten involved in. By the way, YOU are on THIS SITE discussing this just as she discussed it with her close confidants. She needed that, just like you do.

I know you don't want my advice, but just in case, simply LEAVE HER ALONE over this and let her heal. Stop with the snooping, let her know it's all going to be ok and move on.

I'm going to hit this point also, because you'd better be able to deal with it (and I've also stated this, many times on this site). You can never go back. Other men know the excitement your wife feels when she's filled with sexual desire, how her face looks and her voice changes when she's turned on. They know how her kisses taste and how her lips feel pleasuring their cocks. They know how her pussy tastes and feels and they know the sounds she makes when she craves not yours, but THEIR cocks inside of them. They know what it's like to give her that pleasure, they know the taste of her pussy and the feel of their bare cocks in her pussy and they know the feeling of "unloading their balls" (to use the term so many guys like to use to describe it) inside of your wife. And they've done it over and over. In some cases, other guys have done the same.

Now, you can channel that into some sort of "greatest hits" jackoff material for yourself and call it good and just put the negative feelings you have into the back of your mind. Or, you can obsess over this even further and live the reality of a fantasy gone bad and let it eat you up. I don't know if Mr Hw can help you with how to accomplish any of this, but he went down a different path with me, and I was just as bad or worse as either of your wives during my "cheating years". He just handled it completely differently and I think he's discussed that on the site as well.

As I stated, I don't wish to cause conflict or confusion, I simply wish to help you two out of it and offer this as a warning to the other guys on the site who don't fully grasp the consequences of that which they desire. I really hope I'm not called names or some sort of "Fem Dom Bitch" again over this because that is not my intent or feeling at all.

I wish you both the best of luck and if I've misinterpreted this long running drama then I'm truly sorry.

Mrs Hotwife
That was a very insightful message you wrote, thank you for posting that. What you said helped deepen my own feelings about my experiences as a cuckold, thank you Mrs Hotwife.
 
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I'm going to be VERY DIRECT and unfiltered and I DO NOT wish to offend you, I just offer a very COLD version of what I believe is the truth here. If I cause offense, I apologize and will refrain from further commentary on the topic.

I'm not looking for conflict here at all and I know you've both gotten what you consider are mixed messages from my post. Let me make this comment. To ALL of you guys who want this and are ENCOURAGING your wives to have sex with other men. ABOVE is EXACTLY what I have warned you about and predicted. You encouraged her to fuck other guys but she did so on HER terms, exactly as I've told you countless times on this forum could happen. Once you found out, you didn't react positively or stay cool about it, you GOT ANGRY. Now I read about possible divorce in the future. THIS!! I've told you that you can't express anger or jealousy in these circumstances but you did anyway. SURE, you are angry jealous, humiliated, etc. That IS part of this lifestyle. The trouble is my oft stated Rule Number 1) Preserve your primary relationship at all cost, has been ignored.

So, from her perspective, YOU encouraged it, SHE did it HER WAY, and you didn't like that at all. Now, not only do you want her to quit, you've embarrassed her, humiliated her, gotten her into something she never wanted to be into in the first place (most likely) and YOU have brought chaos down on your relationship to the point of losing it. Do you understand this? YOU are to blame, right?

No wonder she's pissed off and angry, dismissive now, etc. She did this, she enjoyed it and she most likely would have enjoyed continuing to do it. But, you stepped in doing everything I've warned you not to do. You really have no excuses in this, as I've said before. Each is clearly embarrassed and has quit their activity. IT"S NEVER COMING BACK! At least not on your terms. If you're lucky, you will let all of this fantasy go now and focus on repairing your relationship, letting her know that you don't blame her and that none of this is her fault. That you understand how it happened, that the experience and lifestyle just isn't right for your relationship and that you should just move on with a normal marriage. Continuing to discuss this or to follow up on all of your suspicions is going to destroy the chances you have of preserving what remains of your marriage.

By the way, so what if her daughter knew about it or other people know about it? That's exactly how it goes, she gets excited, perhaps tells a few close confidants and that's it. Of course her close confidants or going to be pissed off at you when you make her life miserable over this whole thing, and it's a thing that as of now she wishes she had NEVER gotten involved in. By the way, YOU are on THIS SITE discussing this just as she discussed it with her close confidants. She needed that, just like you do.

I know you don't want my advice, but just in case, simply LEAVE HER ALONE over this and let her heal. Stop with the snooping, let her know it's all going to be ok and move on.

I'm going to hit this point also, because you'd better be able to deal with it (and I've also stated this, many times on this site). You can never go back. Other men know the excitement your wife feels when she's filled with sexual desire, how her face looks and her voice changes when she's turned on. They know how her kisses taste and how her lips feel pleasuring their cocks. They know how her pussy tastes and feels and they know the sounds she makes when she craves not yours, but THEIR cocks inside of them. They know what it's like to give her that pleasure, they know the taste of her pussy and the feel of their bare cocks in her pussy and they know the feeling of "unloading their balls" (to use the term so many guys like to use to describe it) inside of your wife. And they've done it over and over. In some cases, other guys have done the same.

Now, you can channel that into some sort of "greatest hits" jackoff material for yourself and call it good and just put the negative feelings you have into the back of your mind. Or, you can obsess over this even further and live the reality of a fantasy gone bad and let it eat you up. I don't know if Mr Hw can help you with how to accomplish any of this, but he went down a different path with me, and I was just as bad or worse as either of your wives during my "cheating years". He just handled it completely differently and I think he's discussed that on the site as well.

As I stated, I don't wish to cause conflict or confusion, I simply wish to help you two out of it and offer this as a warning to the other guys on the site who don't fully grasp the consequences of that which they desire. I really hope I'm not called names or some sort of "Fem Dom Bitch" again over this because that is not my intent or feeling at all.

I wish you both the best of luck and if I've misinterpreted this long running drama then I'm truly sorry.

Mrs Hotwife
As always, well thought out and well written. The way one responds is SO important to a relationship.
 
Besides the fact that a stable marriage and relationship in this lifestyle is maintained only through communication, I do not want to make other comments, just to tell if a woman cheats she will never be the most guilty part, she does it for some well-defined reason, and this happens when there is a lack of communication with her husband.
I guess that makes some sense, someone wouldn't cheat unless there's something wrong in the relationship
 
I'm going to be VERY DIRECT and unfiltered and I DO NOT wish to offend you, I just offer a very COLD version of what I believe is the truth here. If I cause offense, I apologize and will refrain from further commentary on the topic.

I'm not looking for conflict here at all and I know you've both gotten what you consider are mixed messages from my post. Let me make this comment. To ALL of you guys who want this and are ENCOURAGING your wives to have sex with other men. ABOVE is EXACTLY what I have warned you about and predicted. You encouraged her to fuck other guys but she did so on HER terms, exactly as I've told you countless times on this forum could happen. Once you found out, you didn't react positively or stay cool about it, you GOT ANGRY. Now I read about possible divorce in the future. THIS!! I've told you that you can't express anger or jealousy in these circumstances but you did anyway. SURE, you are angry jealous, humiliated, etc. That IS part of this lifestyle. The trouble is my oft stated Rule Number 1) Preserve your primary relationship at all cost, has been ignored.

So, from her perspective, YOU encouraged it, SHE did it HER WAY, and you didn't like that at all. Now, not only do you want her to quit, you've embarrassed her, humiliated her, gotten her into something she never wanted to be into in the first place (most likely) and YOU have brought chaos down on your relationship to the point of losing it. Do you understand this? YOU are to blame, right?

No wonder she's pissed off and angry, dismissive now, etc. She did this, she enjoyed it and she most likely would have enjoyed continuing to do it. But, you stepped in doing everything I've warned you not to do. You really have no excuses in this, as I've said before. Each is clearly embarrassed and has quit their activity. IT"S NEVER COMING BACK! At least not on your terms. If you're lucky, you will let all of this fantasy go now and focus on repairing your relationship, letting her know that you don't blame her and that none of this is her fault. That you understand how it happened, that the experience and lifestyle just isn't right for your relationship and that you should just move on with a normal marriage. Continuing to discuss this or to follow up on all of your suspicions is going to destroy the chances you have of preserving what remains of your marriage.

By the way, so what if her daughter knew about it or other people know about it? That's exactly how it goes, she gets excited, perhaps tells a few close confidants and that's it. Of course her close confidants or going to be pissed off at you when you make her life miserable over this whole thing, and it's a thing that as of now she wishes she had NEVER gotten involved in. By the way, YOU are on THIS SITE discussing this just as she discussed it with her close confidants. She needed that, just like you do.

I know you don't want my advice, but just in case, simply LEAVE HER ALONE over this and let her heal. Stop with the snooping, let her know it's all going to be ok and move on.

I'm going to hit this point also, because you'd better be able to deal with it (and I've also stated this, many times on this site). You can never go back. Other men know the excitement your wife feels when she's filled with sexual desire, how her face looks and her voice changes when she's turned on. They know how her kisses taste and how her lips feel pleasuring their cocks. They know how her pussy tastes and feels and they know the sounds she makes when she craves not yours, but THEIR cocks inside of them. They know what it's like to give her that pleasure, they know the taste of her pussy and the feel of their bare cocks in her pussy and they know the feeling of "unloading their balls" (to use the term so many guys like to use to describe it) inside of your wife. And they've done it over and over. In some cases, other guys have done the same.

Now, you can channel that into some sort of "greatest hits" jackoff material for yourself and call it good and just put the negative feelings you have into the back of your mind. Or, you can obsess over this even further and live the reality of a fantasy gone bad and let it eat you up. I don't know if Mr Hw can help you with how to accomplish any of this, but he went down a different path with me, and I was just as bad or worse as either of your wives during my "cheating years". He just handled it completely differently and I think he's discussed that on the site as well.

As I stated, I don't wish to cause conflict or confusion, I simply wish to help you two out of it and offer this as a warning to the other guys on the site who don't fully grasp the consequences of that which they desire. I really hope I'm not called names or some sort of "Fem Dom Bitch" again over this because that is not my intent or feeling at all.

I wish you both the best of luck and if I've misinterpreted this long running drama then I'm truly sorry.

Mrs Hotwife
Yes I understand everything you are saying but this was ongoing even before we had discussed anything - she expressly knew I did not want her communicating with this guy - so how am I to blame for that - and her daughter Knew and that was even before any sharing was mentioned - so I didn’t put anything into her head - it was already ongoing - I knew something was up and eventually got my answers and like the other guy so much more was revealed . We have put any sharing etc on the back burner and if it was to come up she would need to instigate it . He was only a guy that used to wave at her ( she drives buses ) , then it turned out he was her ex - the one - her true love - talk turned to sex - I did not instigate any of that - so who was humiliated hearing that and it’s natural to be angry in that situation - not every guy cuck or not - anyway we have worked through it and ok for now - as you say I take no offence to your posts and not everyone has an understanding hubby / relationship like yours so I applaud you both for that -😀😀😀