Anyone else have this

That has to be THE most dreaded issue, her having feelings for her lover, enough so to cause uncertainty. I imagine you head floods with thoughts and all sorts of wrong conclusions and wild scenarios. This where I've observed here that it takes a very smart and sensitive wife to not lose her sense of reason. A smart wife considers the implications and understands the freedom she has. Ultimately she's the one that decides if she wants to get fucked or not and if she wants to risk getting pregnant. Not all women are up to managing that well.
I thought I was a pretty smooth player (a legend in my own mind....) but I wasn't prepared to have a discussion with her when she was emotional about her BF, and in a way I was over my head, but somehow we managed to convince one another that it was going to be ok, - that she could in fact love two men. There was a few emotional days and then we starting coming to terms with it all and things returned to what they had been. She realized she couldn't give him up, and I didn't want it to end either, especially since our marital sex lives were benefiting.
 
Recently my wife has been playing and having a great time but I’m kind of taken aback by the speed at which our choices and preferences have changed.

When we first started, the rules were 1) I’m always there during play
2) no solo dates alone
3) no overnights.

Recently, she has really leaned into the first two, and really wants to do the last also. The chance is there for her. I want her to experience this because I know she wants it but I’m not sure I’m really comfortable with it. I feel left behind. It’s not even a lifestyle for us anymore. It’s a lifestyle for her. I’m just here. Not a part of anything.

For those who will say “talk to her”, we have, a lot, about this same thing. Good conversations. She is aware of how I’m feeling.

Any advice, or has anyone else gone through this. Like I said, we have talked a lot about this but I would love to discuss with others as well.

Yes all 3 rules will eventually be broken, but it will be exciting for all of you! Just let it happen and enjoy posting the adventures on here ;-)