Has anyone introduced their wife by sharing the fantasy, and telling her we'll keep it as a fantasy only? So to be less intimidating for her, she doesn't actually have to cuckold you, but just say she has. Perhaps she would go out with her friends, and come home and pretend to you that she has cuckolded you? Sorry if this is boring. Perhaps later on she will decide to do it for real?
Ter her we'll keep it fatasy
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I said it was a dream I had. It opened so many doors. But I did it at her pace.
This has been exactly what we have been doing. I explained that I needed a little more mental stimulation to help stay excited. We've been together a long time and familiarity and routine have taken their toll. I told her that I knew she would never do it but it would help if she just pretended for me. At first she was not so good at it but over time she has become very good at it. She has learned more about what pushes my buttons through this.
I can also tell that the thought is tumbling around in her mind by the creative stories she come up with. I get the sense that a sort of seed is planted but that's because I've always hoped against hope for her to come out of her shell a little more. So, far this has been the most effective approach for me personally.
Thanks @Garrett
Did you give her much detail about the dream?
Was she permitted by you to cuckold you?
Were you dominant/submissive?
Were you watching?
I think that when telling a wife about a cuckold fantasy, you would want to mention that you want her to cheat, and not you, and why.
Did you give her much detail about the dream?
Was she permitted by you to cuckold you?
Were you dominant/submissive?
Were you watching?
I think that when telling a wife about a cuckold fantasy, you would want to mention that you want her to cheat, and not you, and why.
We watched a movie "Easy-A" with Emma Stone (a bit of a teen movie really, but not too bad) where it's revealed that a wife cheats on a husband, and it he broke off the marriage. My wife said he didn't really need to do that. I thought about asking my wife about her comment, as a seqway into saying that I would be a little turned on if she cheated on me. To imagine that another man has seen her and seduced her and his dick had been inside her now was hot. To find out she had made me a humiliated cuckold would not make me angry, but instead more horny for her than ever.
I'd would reassure her, she doesn't really need to actually cuckold me, but she could made a hint or a joke here or there that she had slept with another man or might do.
I'd would reassure her, she doesn't really need to actually cuckold me, but she could made a hint or a joke here or there that she had slept with another man or might do.
Sorry I missed your comment. I described a mmf in the dream. You could tell the gears were spinning.
We made no declaratives about keeping it a fantasy. We did make it a rule that any line of adventure could be immediately terminated if either of us were concerned. And then I upped the ante bit by bit, followed by both fantasy and reality based discussions. Once she knew I probably wou;dn't love her less afterwards, and once we undersood our paramaters to start, she was keen.
thebeginner
Well-Known Member
Yes, it's a very good place to start. When I brought up the idea with my wife she was very enthusiastic so long as it remained fantasy. She was adamant it wasn't something she wanted to do for real. The funny thing was the more we roleplayed the fantasy, and watched hotwife/cuckold porn, the more comfortable she became with the idea. It also made her incredibly wet and horny and improved our sex life.
Little by little she became more curious. As she researched it more and more it became less scary for her. After about 3-4 years she decided she wanted to try for real.
You found your way to the magic!
As long as my wife is assured that we are only fantasizing and there's no risk of facing all the fallout she will talk about having bigger cocks and doing things she normally wouldn't. I see it as a seed. Just having those thoughts in her head is a victory for me. She has gotten much more descriptive with her "dirty talk" in bed. I asked her to help me stay aroused so she's coming up with her ideas based on what she thinks will get me excited. When you're dealing with a sexually reluctant spouse the small steps appear to be the most foundational.
We would watch porn together and I would act like I'm just choosing random videos. I would always throw a gloryhole or theater video on and it first it was I would never do that, then I don't think I could do that, to that's kind of hot, to actually going to do it.
thebeginner
Well-Known Member
Yes, exactly. Every small step is a little victory. It really can't be rushed. Push too hard and you might find yourself taking a step or two backward, or worse, having her shut down the idea completely. It comes down to them changing their whole belief system around the idea.
Let's face it, our society's belief system =
+ monogamy good, nonmonogamy BAD;
+ sex with anyone other than your husband, even with his consent, is cheating and BAD
+ sex with multiple guys, SHAMEFUL
+ enjoying sex with others outside your marriage, SHAMEFUL, not to mention humiliating if anyone were to find out
+ a husband who enjoys his wife infidelities, embarrassing, not to mention an unloving husband
...just to name a few
It's a lot to work through. One by one they need to take each of those beliefs and when they come to the realization they don't hold water, are no longer useful, do more harm than good in most relationships, and without those beliefs, they can have an incredible sex life, with a devoted husband, and a strong marriage, well, that's when the tide turns and the adventure begins.
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