Much of what you said in the above paragraph resonated with me. I have been in a cuckold marriage for over 40 years. Our union, primary because of cuckolding evolved into a Femdom marriage for over 30 years. I too worked in an extremely challenging, position that required numerous decisions each day, some of which, if wrong could have had a serious negative impact upon my career. As I advanced up the ladder, my wife assumed most of the home/familt responsibilities and I was more than happy to never question her decisions. I told her a number of times that she needed not only to take complete control of our homelife, but control of me. I had felt a deep need for years to be completely submissive to her needs and desires. Submissivness is not in her DNA, so she had no hesitation about picking up that gauntlet and we have never looked back. .
Later on we agreed to add a corporal discipline component, as there occasions where I would try to challenged her authority over some issue. Her discipline had nothing to do with sex, but was to restore her dominance over me when she felt it was slipping away. Like you, I understand the "addiction" as I learned to crave the pain even though she would never apply it for my pleasure, only for correction.. There were some real painful nights, as well as the following few days after a secession. Because she would be dealing with all the financial issues, raising her young family, while working full time, she decided that I would be responsible for the routine household duties. The fact she is OCD doesn't;t make completion of those duties simple.
We had already agreed earlier our marriage that she she could enjoy the pleasures of other men that she felt an attraction to, but she insisted that a similar privilege was never to be given to me. I had to be totally devoted to her. No discussion. Over the years she took advantage of that "license" and engaged in both short relationships and long term affairs. Because I was never allowed to meet any of her lovers, though I knew at least 3 of them socially, there was never any submissivness on my part to a "bull". Interesting she was sub to her on & off again boyfriend of over 25 years. He called, she ran to him. Guess everyone needs somebody to balance out our personal control.
