yes you are correct if your wife is happy that is all that matters. Couples swinging with couples I do not think size or shape matters so much as performance, as for your question of would I play with you, one on one, or as a threesome no, as a couple maybe depending on what your wife looks like, or if I was being fucked in a club by several men, I do not make choose, any or all who want to wait their turn will take me. again, it is only my preference or choice. Today my choice is well hung black males. so perhaps that sheds some light on my rating as well.
Do you and your wife play as a couple? or Does she play and you watch?