My husband and I have been together for almost 20 years. He is my first and only. I’ve never been hit on or even kissed another person. Recently we have talked about the hotwife LS. It is definitely appealing to me, but I worry about embarrassing him. What if no one hits on me still? I’ve lost about 80 pounds so I know that’s part of my hang up - still feeling the same size as I was and that it’s not enough. I love that he is happy with me, but I imagine guys love being able to have something other guys want - what if that’s not the case for him? Is that a big thing for guys? I worry He will realize he got stuck with what no one else wants. And just to note - he isn’t pushing me into this. He does compliment me. He thinks having others tell me will help my confidence. I’m just not so sure.
What if you are with someone no one else wants?
- Thread starter randomuser7654
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I think every lady is a goddess all shapes and sizes so don’t matter what other things
You will be surprised that guys will have a love of a verity of women’s shape and sizes. They do not always fit what the media have designated as this is the only beauty. Trust there is men that will count themselves lucky to have a chance with you.
I think you will be truly surprised when you put yourself out there at the amount of guys lining up to have some fun with you!
There are definitely men who would like you better at your heaviest rather than your current weight. All women have insecurities, some feel they are too small in certain areas and most think they are too heavy.
If no one hits on you at a particular time that just means that those men weren’t right for you.
A nice first step would be to go to a club, dressed sexy without the intention of finding somebody. Dance with your husband and watch for the guys that are attracted to you. You will get looks!
We have a similar situation with some differences. My wife has fairly low self esteem. I do everything I can to build it up but it's definitely an issue.
Unfortunately we haven't had any guys try and hit on her. It's one thing when guys see her pix etc but in real life, it just doesn't happen. It's definitely been noted by her and she's taken a confidence hit because of it.
We haven't been able to move past that stage yet so unfortunately I can't offer much advice. I hope it works out for you.
Unfortunately we haven't had any guys try and hit on her. It's one thing when guys see her pix etc but in real life, it just doesn't happen. It's definitely been noted by her and she's taken a confidence hit because of it.
We haven't been able to move past that stage yet so unfortunately I can't offer much advice. I hope it works out for you.
there are a lot of men, like me, who prefer curvy women. no skinny-minnies for me.
it's also, not true, that all women are attracted to the same kind of man. example, my wife preferred bald men. Why, you ask. i have no idea.
so, dress attractively, put a smile on your face, exude confidence & happy hunting.
you're welcome, & no charge.
it's also, not true, that all women are attracted to the same kind of man. example, my wife preferred bald men. Why, you ask. i have no idea.
so, dress attractively, put a smile on your face, exude confidence & happy hunting.
you're welcome, & no charge.
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You should take the leap of faith and post some pics. They can be as G, or ar XXX as you wish. You could also just dip your toe in and send the via DM to one of us here before hand.
Why do you worry about embarrassing him? Just like women love different types of men, men love different types of women. It is great that he is happy with you and that you both want to see if the hotwife LS is something to enjoy. Just go out there, show yourself and have fun. You will notice you will be noticed! Men will look at you. And you will see that men will flirt with you. It will build your confidence and then it will take off.
Otherwise if this is a step to fast, start here, show yourself and see the reactions. This is something you can do together with your husband. Just have fun and enjoy it.
Hope this helps (a little).
If you attend a lifestyle resort she will get approached. No doubt about that.
I have to echo the comments here... from my teens onwards I've been attracted to women my own age, and women much older (two who were 60+ years old when I was in my teens, many who were 40+ and 50+ when I was in my 20's and 30's) I've been with statuesque athletes, lithe and slender dancers, rubenesque artists and ever body shape in between, dresses sizes 4 to 28+, and every single one of them has been incredibly sexy and deeply desirable - there's no little number matrix or body/figure formula for sexy. Obviously your husband sees something very special in you; it would be nice to share that and let others see it too.
If it's out "in the wild" rather than in a lifestyle club or context, most guys simply won't hit on a married woman or a woman who is obviously "with" a guy. They may, however, be admiring her without her noticing... something you should look out for and point out to her. When I worked in a hotel I heard loads of husbands ask their wives "was he flirting either you?" Only for the wife to incredulously react as if hubby was being crazy for thinking anyone would want to flirt with "THEM" (in their mind, they were middle aged mum's who no-one would be interested in... whereas we all saw them as extremely attractive women who just happened to be 35+)
I lost a bunch of weight too right before we started bringing in guys. If I was in front of you I would say “look me in the eyes, guys will line up to be with you.” Don’t go to bars, clubs, etc to find a guy. Start online and anonymous. Post pictures of your body that aren’t identifiable and with your husbands consent of course. Then watch how many guys will be begging you for sex. From there, take it slow and meet the guy. Make sure the hubby knows that you only want him and he can stop anything at anytime for any reason. The first time he watches you cum from another man will either be the beginning of a new phase or something you have to get over. He might get angry, just remind him that he has done more to please you than anyone in the world and that just because it is new doesn’t make it better. It takes communication and patience on both sides.
My wife also suffers from a lack of self esteem when it comes to her looks. We've been together 46 years and naturally in that amount of time we've both put on weight and our self images have taken a hit. Because she doesn't think of herself as attractive it has affected her desire for sex despite my best efforts to tell her that I'm still attracted to her.
I've come to understand that she would rather just avoid the issue altogether. I also know that if I quit trying to express my affirmations that will only result in confirming her lack of desirability. It has put me in the position to where I have to choose to either give in and give up or to "double down" on building her up. I've chosen to "double down".
You can help your husband help you by consciously suppressing your feelings of being unattractive. You've already got those feelings well entrenched. That's your battle now, to change your mind set. The real truth is that looks are superficial. Beauty often conceals an ugly person and their ugly traits. Confidence and attitude (a positive one) are attractive and sexy. I've met plenty of plus sized women that are attractive sexually because of their confidence and their ability to focus on having a good time. Give yourself a break, go out with your husband for drink, just be you! I have a feeling that will lead to putting your doubts to rest.
Go for it your hubby wont leave or think less of you. Different people have different likes and tastes trust me plenty find you attractive.
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