Very often it's simply about allowing or setting a situation without expectation... actually setting up a wife knowingly with the INTENT to play with a stranger, cold without ever discovering whether she could warm to the lifestyle.... is just a non starter - much more likely to simply meet socially without any expression of husband's specific intentions/ goal, just like making new friends, see what the chemistry i, let the situation and perhaps some connection develop... meet a few times, give her space and repetition to get to know someone as a MUTUAL friend for you both, so non-threatening.... and when she's comfortable she will be more relaxed and so quite possibly more open, under the right circumstances, to considering and possibly actually trying the experience.... but for a woman like your wife, you hae tp let it flow and evolve naturally, if you want it to become a lifestyle choice to start with...