Only with 3 bottles of wine…

[ghostrider1]

Guy’s,

I’m confused….

Only with a fair amount of alcohol my wife wants to play…
She had sex with two good male friends of mine on several occasions at our home but only when she is under influence of a couple of bottles of wine.
Obviously she is conscious and seems to know exactly what she is doing.
Sometimes I’m participating but i find it more exciting when they have there way with her…
I was always present.
On several occasions when she knows my friend is coming over for drinks she wears sexy underwear…
The day after she doesn’t bring it up and life continues as usual…

Now the confusing part…
The other day we were having drinks and i told her that she could have sex with another guy but only if she told me who it was with and fill me in on every detail.
She got very angry and was surprised that I would be willing to share her with another guy! She was flabbergasted that i was not jealous! She ignored me for a couple if days and even threatened with a divorce.
I tried to explain that this is a rather common fantasy shared by a lot man…
When I confronted her with the fact that we have doing this with two friends of mine she told me that was totally different…

Does anyone recognize this..?

 

[MarryMistress]

Not an expert
she is playing with you to show her dominance and independence.
you can stop her or let her run your sexlife

 

[Dublinmale]

Yep sadly

So you want to convince your wife

So you have a fantasy about sharing your wife or watching her with another m You want to make it all about her first and foremost, she needs to be on board with the idea. Now this isn't fool proof and it will take the long game. You can't fake this she needs to know its real, you are going to...

www.wifewantstoplay.com

 

[ghostrider1]

Do you really think so?
What do you suggest i should do to take control and avoid her to run my sexlife?

 

[Jeanswatcher]

In my humble opinion:

The problem here is youve been too direct and are trying to control her and dictate to her what she does. Women dont like this, mine certainly doesnt anyway.

She may also have slight regrets about whats happened with your friend yet enjoyed it hiding behind alcohol and yet youve brought this up as justification in telling her she can fuck who she wants. Is this different? to a women definately and very confrontational too.

I identify in most of what youve written in the first part of the message this discribes my cuckoldress in her early 20s......until you get to:

" Now the confusing part…"

Never in 30 odd years as a cuckold have i been so direct to my cuckoldress. We semi started off playing wiith people we/she knew, we both enjoyed it and it became an unwritten rule that afterwards little was said about it. She knows my view and i know its down to her where she plays and with whom, since we started this LS openingly together there have never been any secrets between us. Or any demands either.

My role is to quietly faciliate opportunities not dictate that she must tell me all etc.

You write:

"When I confronted her with the fact that we have doing this with two friends of mine she told me that was totally different…""

Confronted her!! oh dear no wonder she is upset and yes playing with a friend on her own terms is different, very different.

So she is now upset and i dont blame her, this is not about you, your wishes and desires, this is about her enjoying herself with your permission and you gaining the enjoyment and benefit too, then perhaps from this growing together into this lifestyle as we did.

If i had confronted my young wife in this manner id have been lucky to get fuck out of her for months and she would have gone up like a firework!

You need, (again in my view and i know others may disagree) to learn more about this LS, women and how they tick, thats not an easy one as i know.

 

[ghostrider1]

Hi Jeanswatcher,

Many thanks for your elaborate response!
Highly appreciated!

This is sound advise and makes a lot of sense!
Will definitely keep it in mind!
Anticipating the right role, as suggested, facilitate and taking it one step at the time since women are complex and sophisticated creatures unlike us men..
Obviously you know what you are talking about…

Thanks again for your wise and kind words!!

Take care!

 

[jw_kk]

Perhaps a different perspective:

Your wife is home, a comfortable space, safe, where she feels some control. She is using alcohol to lower, or even eliminate her sexual inhibitions, whatever they may be. The combination "allows" her to enjoy her sexual desires, potentially combining the overall decrease/loss of inhibition with loss of control, or at least an excuse for it.

Alcohol can take the "blame" if things don't go as hoped, as in "Well, I was drunk, so I didn't mean to fuck both your friends..."

The fact that you're there, at a minimum complicit in her drunk sex, if not a direct participant builds both the excuse, and your implied consent to her fucking other men.

You trying to change the game, so to speak, "Honey, I'm OK with you dating and fucking other men..." - that is a different situation entirely, and if not her idea, or one that peaks her interest, you get the experience she delivered.

 

[Hwcouple702]

In my humble opinion:

The problem here is youve been too direct and are trying to control her and dictate to her what she does. Women dont like this, mine certainly doesnt anyway.

She may also have slight regrets about whats happened with your friend yet enjoyed it hiding behind alcohol and yet youve brought this up as justification in telling her she can fuck who she wants. Is this different? to a women definately and very confrontational too.

I identify in most of what youve written in the first part of the message this discribes my cuckoldress in her early 20s......until you get to:

" Now the confusing part…"

Never in 30 odd years as a cuckold have i been so direct to my cuckoldress. We semi started off playing wiith people we/she knew, we both enjoyed it and it became an unwritten rule that afterwards little was said about it. She knows my view and i know its down to her where she plays and with whom, since we started this LS openingly together there have never been any secrets between us. Or any demands either.

My role is to quietly faciliate opportunities not dictate that she must tell me all etc.

You write:

"When I confronted her with the fact that we have doing this with two friends of mine she told me that was totally different…""

Confronted her!! oh dear no wonder she is upset and yes playing with a friend on her own terms is different, very different.

So she is now upset and i dont blame her, this is not about you, your wishes and desires, this is about her enjoying herself with your permission and you gaining the enjoyment and benefit too, then perhaps from this growing together into this lifestyle as we did.

If i had confronted my young wife in this manner id have been lucky to get fuck out of her for months and she would have gone up like a firework!

You need, (again in my view and i know others may disagree) to learn more about this LS, women and how they tick, thats not an easy one as i know.

Exactly right! Whatever you do, stop giving her "permission with conditions" and being so direct with her. Nothing is more exasperating for a girl in the LS.

 

[PNNP]

you can give her the reaction she needs and want, you have to go full on playing jealous, so she knows you love her, only then you will give her what she needs and wants. One of the pieces I was missing in my fictional stories about my wife with other men, was my jealousy, at once I rewrote my stories, she fully committed to them. Of course I had to leave out other girls in them too, so she could be the Queen and the only Queen.

 

[Diver_35]

From what I cam able to take from the posting is she will play after drinking a fair amount of wine but when you suggest she play on her on she gets upset.

The first thing I believe she is using the alcohol as a relaxer to lower her deep seated belief that she should be a nice girl and be loyal to her husband even though she puts on sexy underware for your friend.

The second thing is she is in a safe zone where you are there to protect her if anything goes wrong. It took some time before my wife would have sex with anyone including her favorite fuck buddy if I wasn't there but the first time she did she said she actually enjoyed it more because she could be more sluty without lowering my vision of her as the perfect woman.

 

[nicebiguy]

Perhaps a different perspective:

Your wife is home, a comfortable space, safe, where she feels some control. She is using alcohol to lower, or even eliminate her sexual inhibitions, whatever they may be. The combination "allows" her to enjoy her sexual desires, potentially combining the overall decrease/loss of inhibition with loss of control, or at least an excuse for it.

Alcohol can take the "blame" if things don't go as hoped, as in "Well, I was drunk, so I didn't mean to fuck both your friends..."

The fact that you're there, at a minimum complicit in her drunk sex, if not a direct participant builds both the excuse, and your implied consent to her fucking other men.

You trying to change the game, so to speak, "Honey, I'm OK with you dating and fucking other men..." - that is a different situation entirely, and if not her idea, or one that peaks her interest, you get the experience she delive

Guy’s,

I’m confused….

Only with a fair amount of alcohol my wife wants to play…
She had sex with two good male friends of mine on several occasions at our home but only when she is under influence of a couple of bottles of wine.
Obviously she is conscious and seems to know exactly what she is doing.
Sometimes I’m participating but i find it more exciting when they have there way with her…
I was always present.
On several occasions when she knows my friend is coming over for drinks she wears sexy underwear…
The day after she doesn’t bring it up and life continues as usual…

Now the confusing part…
The other day we were having drinks and i told her that she could have sex with another guy but only if she told me who it was with and fill me in on every detail.
She got very angry and was surprised that I would be willing to share her with another guy! She was flabbergasted that i was not jealous! She ignored me for a couple if days and even threatened with a divorce.
I tried to explain that this is a rather common fantasy shared by a lot man…
When I confronted her with the fact that we have doing this with two friends of mine she told me that was totally different…

Does anyone recognize this..?

Yup, I'm an x drunk and over the years of sobriety I've learned a lot about the effects of alcohol. The 1st thing that happens is it reduces a persons inhibitions,second is a change in personality. If she's drinking a couple bottles of wine she's drunk. At that point all bets are off,the alcohol is in control. When I would get drunk I called it "anything can happen day" because I pretty much was unable to make good decisions and never knew what I would do. Read up on it and see if it helps you figure things out.

 

[ghostrider1]

you can give her the reaction she needs and want, you have to go full on playing jealous, so she knows you love her, only then you will give her what she needs and wants. One of the pieces I was missing in my fictional stories about my wife with other men, was my jealousy, at once I rewrote my stories, she fully committed to them. Of course I had to leave out other girls in them too, so she could be the Queen and the only Queen.

Spot on!
She needs me to be very jealous!
That was indeed one of her arguments why she got so angry. It seemed that i was not jealous at all by “allowing” her sex with a stranger…
Thanks for that!

 

[Jeanswatcher]

you can give her the reaction she needs and want, you have to go full on playing jealous, so she knows you love her, only then you will give her what she needs and wants. One of the pieces I was missing in my fictional stories about my wife with other men, was my jealousy, at once I rewrote my stories, she fully committed to them. Of course I had to leave out other girls in them too, so she could be the Queen and the only Queen.

I dont often comeback and reply to a post after ive given my views, however its an interesting idea "playing jealous": obviously we are all different, thankfully but ive been thinking about this.

In our relationship it was my young girlfriend that drove us into this LS, she later admitted i probably was always destined to become her cuck husband once we were engaged, then married when she was 18. Once i had unlocked her sexuality physically her mind then became very kinky, probably unusually so for a girl who had just turned 16 and certainly more than mine, then again slim, 6ft, pretty and a fine wearer of tight jeans she wasnt short of opportunities.

She was the jealous one, i was more mature, relaxed and laid back as i knew she was being chased by other men, so an admission soon after that she had cheated on me her boyfriend didnt surprise me, what did was that i forgave her. Soon after being married she cheated again this time it was a secret affair.

She only chose to show me her second lover after we had by then enjoyed plays simular to those discribed by the OP but she had limited this to being fondled infront of me. They were considered a bit of drunken fun, if she wasnt keen on me fondling another women.

Her lover was simply her lover no drink needed.

She has said later she wanted me to know and was sure i would accept her having a lover by this time and WOULDNT be jealous but find this a turn on.

Therefore in our case, i know had she considered it likely i would be jealous, it certainly wouldnt have stopped her plays but i doubt she would have admitted them.

 

[coroner7]

Some things are better left unsaid. Alcohol can be an excuse for 'letting go' and 'woops..well that just happened!' I've had similar where I would ask my wife if she wanted to fuck another guy and she would always say no. However, after some alcohol and engaging with another couple...things just progressed. Let it flow!

 

[ghostrider1]

Some things are better left unsaid. Alcohol can be an excuse for 'letting go' and 'woops..well that just happened!' I've had similar where I would ask my wife if she wanted to fuck another guy and she would always say no. However, after some alcohol and engaging with another couple...things just progressed. Let it flow!

Sound advise!
Indeed! Some things ARE better left unsaid…
The only reason I brought it up in a conversation was the fact that she never cucked me without my presence…
Only with me in the same room in the safety of our house…

So…i’ll leave it for now and see how this will progress…Maybe she will leave me in a bar for some stranger and fill me in later or not..
But.. it will be totally up to her own initiative without any suggestions from my side..
I have learned so much from that… ;-)

Thank you Coroner7!

 

[ghostrider1]

I dont often comeback and reply to a post after ive given my views, however its an interesting idea "playing jealous": obviously we are all different, thankfully but ive been thinking about this.

In our relationship it was my young girlfriend that drove us into this LS, she later admitted i probably was always destined to become her cuck husband once we were engaged, then married when she was 18. Once i had unlocked her sexuality physically her mind then became very kinky, probably unusually so for a girl who had just turned 16 and certainly more than mine, then again slim, 6ft, pretty and a fine wearer of tight jeans she wasnt short of opportunities.

She was the jealous one, i was more mature, relaxed and laid back as i knew she was being chased by other men, so an admission soon after that she had cheated on me her boyfriend didnt surprise me, what did was that i forgave her. Soon after being married she cheated again this time it was a secret affair.

She only chose to show me her second lover after we had by then enjoyed plays simular to those discribed by the OP but she had limited this to being fondled infront of me. They were considered a bit of drunken fun, if she wasnt keen on me fondling another women.

Her lover was simply her lover no drink needed.

She has said later she wanted me to know and was sure i would accept her having a lover by this time and WOULDNT be jealous but find this a turn on.

Therefore in our case, i know had she considered it likely i would be jealous, it certainly wouldnt have stopped her plays but i doubt she would have admitted them.

Many thanks Jeanswatcher!

All insights and experiences you have shared are highly valued!

 

[ghostrider1]

From what I cam able to take from the posting is she will play after drinking a fair amount of wine but when you suggest she play on her on she gets upset.

The first thing I believe she is using the alcohol as a relaxer to lower her deep seated belief that she should be a nice girl and be loyal to her husband even though she puts on sexy underware for your friend.

The second thing is she is in a safe zone where you are there to protect her if anything goes wrong. It took some time before my wife would have sex with anyone including her favorite fuck buddy if I wasn't there but the first time she did she said she actually enjoyed it more because she could be more sluty without lowering my vision of her as the perfect woman.

You are right, the safe zone is quite important!
Me not being there to protect her is quite significant for her…
I doubt it if she would be capable of letting go completely without my presence..
Time will tell..,
Thank you Diver_35!

 

[ghostrider1]

you can give her the reaction she needs and want, you have to go full on playing jealous, so she knows you love her, only then you will give her what she needs and wants. One of the pieces I was missing in my fictional stories about my wife with other men, was my jealousy, at once I rewrote my stories, she fully committed to them. Of course I had to leave out other girls in them too, so she could be the Queen and the only Queen.

Many thanks PNNP!

 

[Teddy Long]

What’s your honest take on this whole situation

 

[ghostrider1]

What’s your honest take on this whole situation

Not sure what you are asking?