That's very true - everyone will have different limits so it's always best to err on the side of caution esp when you don't know someone. And it's also well observed that that limit can vary greatly depending on who is involved and also the context of the interaction. For example before I retired I held a very senior position in the organisation I worked for, so in my public life I had a good deal of authority and expected to be respected. But in my private life I sought out guys who would use me, often in very degrading ways. So I lead something of a double life, the two parts of which were entirely dependent on context . Likewise I had a good deal of casual sex but I was only at my most submissive with certain men so that was dependent to a large degree on personality. So yes it can be very complicated xx