How I became a cuckold or not

[play4m]

I realized pretty quickly that my girlfriend at the time, then my wife, was an exhibitionist. At first there were shorter dresses and cheeky necklines. Then the dresses (one beige and one red) that she wore at home, especially when friends came. These dresses were almost transparent and I really thought she didn't realize that the sunlight was streaming through and her body was fully visible. When I told her this, she replied that she was wearing panties and bra. But that wasn't always the case... However, when I insisted to stop she stop doing it, or she did it less often…
I admit it was all a bit confusing because she always acts very natural and didn't seem like she wanted to tease, but she also didn't seem to want to stop when I told her she was teasing... She did stopped eventually. One day she told me a car pulled up next to her and asked if she needed a ride. A few months before that, there was also an episode related to a friend of mine whom she had accused of having a crush on her. She was a bit outraged and upset, and when I revealed that certain outfits were too naughty, she seemed surprised. Either way, it seems she really enjoyed putting herself out in public and letting people enjoy seeing her assets.
I have to admit that at first impression she seemed like a woman very in control of her sexuality, but she wasn't really like that. She actually had many taboos and I had the patience to go through each stage.

Our sex life was pretty good, not great, but above average I guess. Initially, there were some jokes about my penis, which he sometimes said was too small, but he always said it was a bad joke.
My wife's biggest fear was ruining the marriage, no matter how hard I tried to get her to talk openly about her desire for penis size she just couldn't. However, she was the first woman I had ever been with who made this joke, so some question marks began to arise. I know I'm not big, but 6 was enough for a lot of chicks.
But then there were many moments when everything seemed fine, when she was climaxing and seemed delighted with what she was getting.

After she gave birth, things changed a bit. Her body changed. Many women hate themselves for what pregnancy and childbirth do to their bodies. Mine, although she pretended to be sad about being fat, got extremely hot as she got pregnant and I think she was very aware of how much of a woman she had become. Once the belly disappeared, she became obsessed with getting rid of those extra pounds. After about 5 months, her body became a temple of arousal.
I will never forget those months. I was always excited. Then my desire to make her happy became obsessive. We slowly introduced toys into our intimate life as a couple. Fun fact, I started with bananas and ended up a year later with a dildo measuring over 9 inch. In those months, I didn't really understand what slippery terrain I had begun to advance on. I had never thought of an open marriage and, although I admit that certain scenes from erotic films remained in my mind, I could not imagine that I wanted a slut or a hot-wife next to me.
However, things got out of hand. If at first she was a little reserved and even reluctant to introduce toys and other fantasies, when the lady got the taste, the demands started to increase 😈
However, what really led to the ruin of the relationship was an incident that had more to do with the fulfillment of a wish I had that she refused me.
Like I said, her body was driving me crazy. And... not just me...
My wife has long legs, so I was used to men turning heads on the street. Now, imagine, her breasts have grown, her hips have rounded and her bottom is the perfect size and shape! The kind that makes your balls swell. All the men fixed their relentless gaze on her buttocks that bounced freely as she rocked her hips. Damn, for the first time I sometimes felt embarrassed when sometimes a guy smiled at her and it seemed to me that she looked back.
As a bonus, she's back to those slightly see-through clothes. I mean, through tight pants or leggings, everyone could see her panties that were mostly the colour of her pants or leggings and went between her buttocks, so it looked like they weren't even there and a bare bottom beautiful could be admired by everyone. . . .

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

Tell me more! Has she actually fucked anyone else?

 

[Vincenzo]

I love sharing my wife with a 2nd dick, especially if it's a big dick while I watch for a few minutes I always join in, so not really a cuckold. But if you can understated that its just fucking, it's the hottest. While I've always joined in, if she were to ask me to just watch, I believe I could

 

[play4m]

The first time "something moved inside me" was an afternoon on a terrace where being watched by men led to something special. It was just the two of us on a weekend without the kids. As we made our way to our table, we passed a table where three men in their 60s were seated. That afternoon my wife was wearing a pair of black nylon pants. The material was transparent and slightly shiny. It flared at the knees, but was extremely tight at the bottom and thighs, and the material clung to the body. She wore a black and gold top and a large, thick chain with gold metal balls that sparkled in the middle of her breasts and caught the eyes of passersby. Our passage did not go unnoticed by the three men. I notice them looking up and after she passed, they turned their heads. I had to admit that her breasts were playing naughty and her bottom looked bare, painted black with a silver tinge. Our table was not far from theirs, set diagonally. One of the men, a guy with gray hair and a neatly trimmed beard, was sitting with his back to our table. From the first minutes I felt that the eyes of the two men who had a full view of our table were always on her. The feeling was so intense that I started to get angry. My irritation was more because I thought they were being to naughty Usually, this kind of situation made me feel good knowing that others were watching. But this time it felt different. It looked like they wanted to pounce on her and drink from her. I tried to ignore it and pretend I was overreacting and it was all just my imagination. I ordered the drinks and for a few minutes I lost their attention, absorbed in our conversation. But when I looked up again, I noticed (a little startled) that the completely gray man had moved from his chair and was facing our table. All three were laughing looking at her with lustful eyes. My irritation became obvious, all three of them noticed that I could see them and tried to straighten up. I had an outburst and said something like, there are three men who would fuck you right here in front of everyone.

She said ''what?" and began to look to the right and to the left. ''There'', I said, ''the three old men''. Obviously, at least one of them noticed her movements and felt uncomfortable. When she looked at them, they seemed engrossed in an interesting conversation. ''You are crazy, these things only happen in your imagination…'' and she keeps smiling, ''you really are obsessed. Go see a doctor.''
But the gray old man did not look away. He seemed to be undressing her with his penetrating eyes.
The evening became very tense. I soon noticed that he had begun to move in his chair. Had she done it from the beginning? I noticed moments where she seemed to arch her back and push her bottom further back. She pushed her breasts forward and pushed her hair back, turning her head slightly towards them. It was clearly a flirt. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed that all three seemed to be enjoying the show, although there was apparently nothing obscene about it. Several times he stood for a long time with his legs wide apart. When I asked her why, the innocent wife answered: the night is very hot. And what can I say... it was a warm July night. Of course her pussy needed a cool down.
I will not reproduce all the sensations experienced then. At one point, however, a madness appeared in my mind. How about I talk to her and the three of them, take her to the room and tell them to fuck her. The big surprise wasn't this abominable idea, the big surprise came from my pants because this thought gave me a strong erection. The problem with such moments is not only that they are totally surprising, but also that they are like a change of heart. Once the thought arises, the feeling grows within you. And it doesn't go away. I mean, until then I didn't consider myself a possible cuckold. The evening ended without me noticing. I had a few impressions where I think she even smiled at them, but I was too absorbed in my imagination to react to reality. Obviously I couldn't say a word about my thought. I couldn't form a sentence. But when we got back to the room that night, I found myself asking straight out: 'Would you like to do it with three at once?' The shock was terrible ! Until then we hadn't even talked about introducing a man or woman into our intimate relationship. The fact that I taught her to use dildos was allegedly my wish and she claimed that she was only doing it for me. So the evening ended with a small argument with her telling me that I was treating her like a whore and that I was a sick person. The evening ended badly, with no sex and feeling ashamed of both my idea and my excitement at the thought. I was ashamed by me especially because of her reaction as an offended woman.

That night was terrible for me. I don't know exactly what, but I had wet dreams and my penis was pounding all night. In the morning, I directly asked her to let me masturbate with her ass. I didn't want to fuck her, I wanted to unload on her ass. She agreed without hesitation. In 8 years of marriage it was the first time I wanted this, I usually did it with her breasts or after she sucked me, I would splash her face.
What I found interesting, thinking about that moment after a while, is that she then did not ask me why I wanted to rub my penis between her buttocks and why I did not want to enter her pussy... she just said :''you really like my big round ass, don't you? I think all three were drooling last night thinking about what it would be like to lick my bum." Those almost whispered words she told me as she stroked the length of my cock between her buttocks gave me a shiver. The ejaculation was almost instantaneous, one of the strongest and most pleasant I've ever had. I threw my cum over her hair and left a big gash on her back and bottom. After a while, talking about then she admitted that she got wet too and it felt great, which was curious because I didn't touch her pussy or breasts.

I think this episode was a turning point.
I must say that since then, sex with her has become more and more rare. Little by little she started training me. First were the refusals to have sex, with explanations, then refusals of other type, more offensive, like I took care of the cat today when you were at work and now I am tired. Sometimes I was allowed to masturbate while watching her.

I think I have become a kind of cuck without knowing it...

 

[play4m]

Tell me more! Has she actually fucked anyone else?

it is more of an explanation that I give myself for my experience. It is not an erotic story. And I write when I have time ... so, eventually you will have the answer,

 

[play4m]

Like in the song by Tears for Fears, The change, ''became a point of view,
I lost your honesty,You lost the life in you''
I wasn't quite ready for the transition to this new type of relationship. But I didn't realize the change then.
Probably I thought we'd be back after a while, as before. It wasn't the case.

Her outfit became more and more provocative. When she dressed for work, she always did so carefully to show off her feminine assets. I found her very careful to look as sexy as possible. I envied her office mates who could look at her. She wore expensive perfumes that she had stopped using when it was just the two of us. I noticed that her dresses became more and more provocative when she was alone with her friends.
Almost every day she aroused me up and I wanted to badly fuck her. And her refusals seemed more and more frequent and became more and more unbearable. But I was unable to react properly, I was in such a helpless state as if I was begging for a hug.
One weekend afternoon with friends, she came home a little groggy, she told me she was horny. She made me eat her pussy and when she started moaning with pleasure she told me to penetrate her. As she writhed and screamed louder and louder, I quickly ejaculated like crazy. She then pushed me gently, said she had a headache and wanted to go to bed. I knew it was my fault, but she didn't seem to understand that her excitement combined with weeks without sex was leading to this mess. I had prematurely ejaculated, but the sexual tension built up after weeks of rejection could be my plausible excuse.
But in the end, I knew I was disappointing for her.
I soon felt that I was becoming something of an intruder. I was only allowed a few things and only sometimes.
However, after a few more months, I had a strong desire to try something new in our relationship.
Since her ass had become my obsession, I decided to try anal sex. I thought I was ready and did my homework by reading a lot on the subject. I even talked to a friend who told me that his wife had a hard time accepting it, but after that, things were better and their relationship not only recovered, but the special moments took it to new heights.

I knew I needed to be convincing, but I felt I could spice up the relationship. And it was something I really wanted.
So one night I told her I wanted to have her ass. She said she understood my wish. It was not surprising that she knew. In other words, she was well aware of my obsession. She told me that she can give me this pleasure as a wife (obviously consensual), but she has to be ready for it. She told me with a smile that she love when I jerk on her ass.
I told her that I would like to fuck her ass at the same time as she fuck her pussy with the dildo. She replied that she didn't think she would like that. But.. since it's something new, she's open and thinks she'll be able to give it a try. Again, she said it takes time.
We decided together to take it easy like we always did.
I started by sticking my tongue in her ass. Soon enough she was masturbating with the big vibrator as I rammed my tongue deeper and deeper into her ass. She told me it makes her feel good. Moreover, her body often betrayed her pleasure. Honestly, I wasn't very happy, I had a constantly leaking penis and I often ended up with crazy uncontrolled ejaculations even without any mechanical stimulation. In fact, things were completely out of my control...
One night, after her asshole was ''widened'' by my tongue and she had already cum, I told her I was ready to enter slowly. At first she still seemed hesitant... She agreed, but said, "Be careful how you do it, so you don't hurt me, or worse, hurt yourself and make a fool of yourself''
Why the hell did she say that then? To make me seem even more insignificant?
What can it mean not to make a fool of yourself in such a situation?
Obviously I found out the answer a few seconds later. I ejaculated upon entering her ass without being able to penetrate her. My cock was almost soft and she said "You say you want to...you can't even be awake". Damn, I felt so bad..
I told her how sorry I was and that we would try again...especially since I want this so bad and now she wants it too.
But the spell was broken then. Worse...now, she was telling me she was afraid to do more and she was only comfortable with my tongue. And this is what she told me for months. She explained to me that she had given it serious thought and that it would remain taboo for her. She asked me not to worry, she loves me and wanted to give me this gift, but if I love her I have to respect her decision to remain untouched. She said she was sorry for giving me false hope, but she felt uncomfortable when I was so close to doing it. She assured me that I could continue what I was doing with the tongue if I wanted to. She said that as if I was doing it just for me and not for her pleasure. She wanted to pretend she didn't care, but her body always said otherwise. A few times she guided my head under her and a few times, when she felt she was close to orgasm, she got on my face and pushed me into her ass.
Her demands became more and more obvious and she frequently encouraged me with gestures or even encouraged me to enter her ass with my tongue or nose even when I didn't necessarily want to. Still, she told me, she doesn't want to put anything up her ass, not even my little cock, or a tiny vibrator. Never. I believed her.
She had become a kind of dominatrix and started teaching me the role of slave…

 

[play4m]

It wasn't long before I felt we had to move to another level.
I felt that the fun of dildos was no longer enough for her, and her sexual desire seemed far, far from her when it came about me.
I decided to resume the discussion about bringing a man into our lives.
When I first asked her if she was going to let the three men fuck her, she wasn't ready. It was a stupid and tactless question.
Only now did I seem to understand her reaction, her anger, for it seemed to me now a question put rather in jest.
After all these years, she was now in a position where she could clearly state that I was no longer able to satisfy her sexual needs.
I started by telling her that she was now a "size queen" and I can blame her for dreaming of a bigger penis. Again she seemed hesitant to admit it, but scolded me for telling she is to blame for. Which wasn't true... One night I was at a bar with her and I told her my fantasy. It took a lot of courage at that point because I have to admit that I was already in a position where she was running our sex life. I was more like a puppy. So, I admitted that I think she would like to fuck another man and that would be fine. In fact, I kept telling her that I meant it and that I wanted badly her to do it. I said that would be fine with me and that I would like to help. She smiled and told me she didn't expect to hear that again. She told me that she didn't need help... She also told me that this could lead to us breaking up.
I explained that we can enjoy new opportunities and that I am sure that love and trust will overcome the risk of separation. I gently told her that she could enjoy the sexual pleasure with another man who would love nothing more than to thrust his cock deep into her body with no strings attached.
That night I finally got my wife to be honest with me about what she thought about my size…
From the moment she was able to talk about it, she told me about a former partner before marriage who had a penis so big it hurt her. She told me that he was a little brutal and that she didn't lube enough. She admitted that now she often wondered what it would have been like if he had been more tactful and she had been better prepared. After 12 years of marriage, that's when I first found out about it. Were there more? She said my penis was very nice, quiet and viable (!?) but admitted that the bigger dildos she was playing with gave her a different kind of pleasure. She finally admitted that she was a " size queen " and said laughing, ''it's your fault!'' After years of trying to get her to experiment with much larger sizes, she admitted that she was addicted to big cocks. It was much easier to get her to open up about her other fantasies... She revealed that she would try with another man. But she said again that this might make me jealous. I told her that was fine and suggested we find someone who has something big. She said with a light laugh that it won't be hard to find someone bigger than my ''little one''.

I think it's obvious to everyone that once a woman starts looking for pleasure, it doesn't take long to find it.
After no more than a few weeks, he told me he found the guy.
He confessed to me that he would like to try a younger partner. She told me she met a guy at the birthday party her cousin Alice had. I was intrigued because I had been there myself and had no idea what she was talking about. I hadn't seen her talking to anyone in particular. There were several hot guys there...but I didn't know which one it was the chosen. I understood that it would have been a young Hispanic man, newly married. I looked surprised but she quickly told me that he is very nice but she didn't particularly like him. Anyway he has some problems with his wife.... ant she quickly felt a connection. Did she ? She thinks she can trust him for such wear and tear... I said OK and asked her how she thought things might go.
She told me...'' well, you said you wanted it for me, for my pleasure. I will arrange!'' "OK, I replayed, shouldn't we arrange together the ''party?'' Then... she told me, ''I want to be alone with him... and I think there will be a few dates, if you agree, and if he is good ...''
Well, honestly, I didn't expect that. I mean okay, she preferred a younger guy for a more intense sex life. But, hell, she don't even know if he is bigger? And she leave me out completely? I told her she was free to do as she pleased, but that I was sad . I also reminded her that it would be my pleasure if I was allowed to watch. She replied that it's not always the way I want it and I should be grateful for what I get. She said ''you gave me your approval, I promised I would think about it, now you can be sure I will do it''. She told me that I could see how she would prepare for dates and that in time she might give me some details about what was going on... I can wank imagining her...

Their relationship lasted for several months.
Each time she was preparing to meet him, she was radiant. Sexy as hell.
I knew him, but I never saw him with her. As for the stories... She didn't say anything about what happens in the first few weeks.
She often went out with him and other young girls ... on certain weekend nights ... in nightclubs where there were many boys. She had always attracted attention... Besides, she always seemed to be relieved. .... by the clothes she wore... by her attitudes... I often wondered, was it just him? It was up to her if she wanted to tell me... So many things were happening...Panties in her bag the next morning....Too many wrinkled clothes or other suspicious stains as a gift...She had a good time and all it was for her...
After some time, one night she confessed to me that she had let that bull fuck her ass several times. She told me that at first it was painful, but after a while she started to experience the sensation. She said that his hardness was terrible at first, but she was the one who asked him to fuck her again on the very second date. So she did it at their first date ! She said she felt another feeling, that he is very attentive and, being big, doesn't go all the way in, just enough to bring her into a different kind of ecstasy. She told me that she would have let me too, but I didn't seem ready and capable enough. She was once again sorry for that... It was the last straw in the series of humiliations in which she brought me to spend my life.
I remember after that confession she took my hand and started masturbating me. She took down her panties, turn her ass to me and opened her bottom telling me to look.
''He touched me in a place you never will. I felt dirty and I don't want to feel that way with you"

I didn't understand why she wouldn't grant me even that...why her cruelty ... why completely destroyed the man in me...

 

[dickhurtz]

is there more?

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

I am trying to understand if you want this or don’t. While some guys enjoy humiliation, it isn’t my thing. While I happily share my wife with other men, I don’t ever want to feel inferior to them. I am the provider for my wife and while I may not have a massive tool, I take great pride in my ability to pleasure her. For us, her play is about variety and frequency. She is able to have more sex than me.

It has taken a lot of communication about expectations for us to find what works for us. It also takes compromise for both sides to make it work. Best of luck to you and your wife.

 

[Vincenzo]

I realized pretty quickly that my girlfriend at the time, then my wife, was an exhibitionist. At first there were shorter dresses and cheeky necklines. Then the dresses (one beige and one red) that she wore at home, especially when friends came. These dresses were almost transparent and I really thought she didn't realize that the sunlight was streaming through and her body was fully visible. When I told her this, she replied that she was wearing panties and bra. But that wasn't always the case... However, when I insisted to stop she stop doing it, or she did it less often…
I admit it was all a bit confusing because she always acts very natural and didn't seem like she wanted to tease, but she also didn't seem to want to stop when I told her she was teasing... She did stopped eventually. One day she told me a car pulled up next to her and asked if she needed a ride. A few months before that, there was also an episode related to a friend of mine whom she had accused of having a crush on her. She was a bit outraged and upset, and when I revealed that certain outfits were too naughty, she seemed surprised. Either way, it seems she really enjoyed putting herself out in public and letting people enjoy seeing her assets.
I have to admit that at first impression she seemed like a woman very in control of her sexuality, but she wasn't really like that. She actually had many taboos and I had the patience to go through each stage.

Our sex life was pretty good, not great, but above average I guess. Initially, there were some jokes about my penis, which he sometimes said was too small, but he always said it was a bad joke.
My wife's biggest fear was ruining the marriage, no matter how hard I tried to get her to talk openly about her desire for penis size she just couldn't. However, she was the first woman I had ever been with who made this joke, so some question marks began to arise. I know I'm not big, but 6 was enough for a lot of chicks.
But then there were many moments when everything seemed fine, when she was climaxing and seemed delighted with what she was getting.

After she gave birth, things changed a bit. Her body changed. Many women hate themselves for what pregnancy and childbirth do to their bodies. Mine, although she pretended to be sad about being fat, got extremely hot as she got pregnant and I think she was very aware of how much of a woman she had become. Once the belly disappeared, she became obsessed with getting rid of those extra pounds. After about 5 months, her body became a temple of arousal.
I will never forget those months. I was always excited. Then my desire to make her happy became obsessive. We slowly introduced toys into our intimate life as a couple. Fun fact, I started with bananas and ended up a year later with a dildo measuring over 9 inch. In those months, I didn't really understand what slippery terrain I had begun to advance on. I had never thought of an open marriage and, although I admit that certain scenes from erotic films remained in my mind, I could not imagine that I wanted a slut or a hot-wife next to me.
However, things got out of hand. If at first she was a little reserved and even reluctant to introduce toys and other fantasies, when the lady got the taste, the demands started to increase 😈
However, what really led to the ruin of the relationship was an incident that had more to do with the fulfillment of a wish I had that she refused me.
Like I said, her body was driving me crazy. And... not just me...
My wife has long legs, so I was used to men turning heads on the street. Now, imagine, her breasts have grown, her hips have rounded and her bottom is the perfect size and shape! The kind that makes your balls swell. All the men fixed their relentless gaze on her buttocks that bounced freely as she rocked her hips. Damn, for the first time I sometimes felt embarrassed when sometimes a guy smiled at her and it seemed to me that she looked back.
As a bonus, she's back to those slightly see-through clothes. I mean, through tight pants or leggings, everyone could see her panties that were mostly the colour of her pants or leggings and went between her buttocks, so it looked like they weren't even there and a bare bottom beautiful could be admired by everyone. . . .

What wish was fulfilled

 

[play4m]

I am trying to understand if you want this or don’t. While some guys enjoy humiliation, it isn’t my thing. While I happily share my wife with other men, I don’t ever want to feel inferior to them. I am the provider for my wife and while I may not have a massive tool, I take great pride in my ability to pleasure her. For us, her play is about variety and frequency. She is able to have more sex than me.

It has taken a lot of communication about expectations for us to find what works for us. It also takes compromise for both sides to make it work. Best of luck to you and your wife.

You're absolutely right, I wasn't the type to want or accept humiliation. I But I slid into and she seemed to like it (?!) I, too, was proud of my ability to please her and of my care for her...
I really don't know what went wrong exactly

 

[Iahotwifeshusband]

You're absolutely right, I wasn't the type to want or accept humiliation. I But I slid into and she seemed to like it (?!) I, too, was proud of my ability to please her and of my care for her...
I really don't know what went wrong exactly

I would sit down and talk with her. This has to work for both of you. She has to be open to your needs too!

That being said, I am nearing another difficult conversation with my sexy wife. It is something that needs to happen every so often to keep things on track. My wife and I get different things out of our situation. She gets the variety and frequency she desires. I do enjoy fucking my wife after she has been filled with cum from her fuck buddy. I also enjoy that she is already turned on and warmed up. She always cums more and much harder with me after she has been with her fuck buddy. I also enjoy playing with my wife even when she hasn’t been with others. So…. What is the problem? This is something the ebbs and flows with the relationship we have, it can be a moving target on how to keep each other our number one priority. It is pretty easy for my wife to feel she is my number one person because there isn’t anyone else. I struggle with feeling less important to my wife at times. I have brought it to her attention multiple times and she is generally receptive to my feedback and she usually responds positively. However, it seems that the corrective behavior tends to be very temporary. I am getting a little frustrated again because if I have to keep reminding my wife to make me a priority, am I her priority? I understand that after 20 years of being together, things get stale and routine. As a result, spending time with me and initiating sex with me very rarely happens. Yet, when her fuck buddy reaches out, she usually jumps at the chance and makes time to play with him. She will then come home and have sex with me. Though, when we are having sex, she always leads or when I try to lead will quickly take over again. She shows zero interest in taking time to enjoy herself or for me to enjoy without a rush. She behaves as though the goal is to get it over with. As soon as I cum, she cleans up, gets dressed, and will go back to whatever she wants to do. Last weekend, I told her I didn’t want her to get dressed and leave after I came. She even agreed to stay after I came, but then did the same thing as soon as I finished. My wife also prepares for sex differently with her fuck buddy than she does with me. She never goes and plays with him without showering and shaving. Contrary, I have to ask her to shower if I want that before having sex and I usually get an eye roll or “do I have to?” The result of her behavior is that I feel as though she looks at sex with me as a chore and can’t wait to get it over with. If that is the case, the I will just take care of it myself. I have zero interest in pity sex from my wife. But if sex with me is a hassle and taking time/caring to please me vs just getting me off is too much to ask, then it will affect my willingness for her to have the freedom to fuck other guys. This scenario has to work for both of us. Is my thought process reasonable?

We have talked through this general issue more times than I care to count and I get more frustrated each time it becomes a problem. The other general concern I have is that my wants/needs are absolutely lower priority for my wife than anyone else’s needs. She prefers to play one on one with other guys and prefers I am not there. She knows that I enjoy being there, even if I don’t participate. Yet, out of her approximately 100 hotwife experiences over the past seven years, I have been involved 3 times. There have been many more opportunities, but it seems as though she magically gets tired of a guy as soon as he mentions me joining them. I guess, at the core, it’s really the same issue. As long as she gets what she wants, everything is fine in her eyes. Please note, this behavior isn’t limited to sex and hotwifing. My wife is self centered and a bit of a narcissist. It is hard for her to see or care about other people’s feelings. However, she does make the extra effort for people she cares about. I have known her for a very long time and can read her like a book. So, it stings when I see her dismiss my wants and needs while prioritizing the wants and needs of others.

Sorry for the rant. As I have said numerous times, this lifestyle is a roller coaster. It can be challenging at times.

 

[play4m]

I would sit down and talk with her. This has to work for both of you. She has to be open to your needs too!

That being said, I am nearing another difficult conversation with my sexy wife. It is something that needs to happen every so often to keep things on track. My wife and I get different things out of our situation. She gets the variety and frequency she desires. I do enjoy fucking my wife after she has been filled with cum from her fuck buddy. I also enjoy that she is already turned on and warmed up. She always cums more and much harder with me after she has been with her fuck buddy. I also enjoy playing with my wife even when she hasn’t been with others. So…. What is the problem? This is something the ebbs and flows with the relationship we have, it can be a moving target on how to keep each other our number one priority. It is pretty easy for my wife to feel she is my number one person because there isn’t anyone else. I struggle with feeling less important to my wife at times. I have brought it to her attention multiple times and she is generally receptive to my feedback and she usually responds positively. However, it seems that the corrective behavior tends to be very temporary. I am getting a little frustrated again because if I have to keep reminding my wife to make me a priority, am I her priority? I understand that after 20 years of being together, things get stale and routine. As a result, spending time with me and initiating sex with me very rarely happens. Yet, when her fuck buddy reaches out, she usually jumps at the chance and makes time to play with him. She will then come home and have sex with me. Though, when we are having sex, she always leads or when I try to lead will quickly take over again. She shows zero interest in taking time to enjoy herself or for me to enjoy without a rush. She behaves as though the goal is to get it over with. As soon as I cum, she cleans up, gets dressed, and will go back to whatever she wants to do. Last weekend, I told her I didn’t want her to get dressed and leave after I came. She even agreed to stay after I came, but then did the same thing as soon as I finished. My wife also prepares for sex differently with her fuck buddy than she does with me. She never goes and plays with him without showering and shaving. Contrary, I have to ask her to shower if I want that before having sex and I usually get an eye roll or “do I have to?” The result of her behavior is that I feel as though she looks at sex with me as a chore and can’t wait to get it over with. If that is the case, the I will just take care of it myself. I have zero interest in pity sex from my wife. But if sex with me is a hassle and taking time/caring to please me vs just getting me off is too much to ask, then it will affect my willingness for her to have the freedom to fuck other guys. This scenario has to work for both of us. Is my thought process reasonable?

We have talked through this general issue more times than I care to count and I get more frustrated each time it becomes a problem. The other general concern I have is that my wants/needs are absolutely lower priority for my wife than anyone else’s needs. She prefers to play one on one with other guys and prefers I am not there. She knows that I enjoy being there, even if I don’t participate. Yet, out of her approximately 100 hotwife experiences over the past seven years, I have been involved 3 times. There have been many more opportunities, but it seems as though she magically gets tired of a guy as soon as he mentions me joining them. I guess, at the core, it’s really the same issue. As long as she gets what she wants, everything is fine in her eyes. Please note, this behavior isn’t limited to sex and hotwifing. My wife is self centered and a bit of a narcissist. It is hard for her to see or care about other people’s feelings. However, she does make the extra effort for people she cares about. I have known her for a very long time and can read her like a book. So, it stings when I see her dismiss my wants and needs while prioritizing the wants and needs of others.

Sorry for the rant. As I have said numerous times, this lifestyle is a roller coaster. It can be challenging at times.

Wow!!! I recognize many of my wife's attitudes.
Finally you summed it up perfectly: ''my wife is self-centered and a little narcissistic''
I have often wondered if this is not what pushes things towards our minimization...
Anyway, I think it's good that I opened this topic from a slightly different perspective.
To be continued

 

[dickhurtz]

My wife and I are interested in meeting other guys regularly. Please register and contact us via private messages on the website - https://bigwifes.us/id67846

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