Any advice on how to lead her

[Snoopsissy]

I would not where to begin with your odd situation. I really don’t understand how you got yourself into that mess

Exactly - and it’s getting progressively worse on her part - I personally think she is still seething with bitterness and spite because her husband left her after 25 years for another woman so she takes it out on the next guy to come along . Maybe he left her because she wasn’t putting out or getting what he wanted from someone else / thsts what usually happens isn’t it ? .

 

[Snoopsissy]

Bet your wishing you hadn’t replied now ha ha - many thanks for your input but 😀😀

 

[CuckmeCleveland]

I don’t see that you have the relationship to make this work.

 

[Snoopsissy]

I don’t see that you have the relationship to make this work.

Yes I agree unfortunately - I’m enemy no1 . She won’t agree for us both to attend counselling to deal with these issues - I’m at fault and I need to find a way to fix my behaviour - I don’t understand it - she has a good life - just taken one of her sons in , all new stuff for his bedroom $ 900 worth , no real thanks , having to work on past my retirement age as her ...... needs money to get his exs name from the deeds for his house in Spain - again the entitlement and ungrateful ness from my wife is astonishing - I’m tempted to tell her she should be sucking my cock every night for what I’m doing for her family not pulling me to pieces every chance she gets ( she has been through menopause years ago so it’s not that .

 

[CuckmeCleveland]

Exactly - and it’s getting progressively worse on her part - I personally think she is still seething with bitterness and spite because her husband left her after 25 years for another woman so she takes it out on the next guy to come along . Maybe he left her because she wasn’t putting out or getting what he wanted from someone else / thsts what usually happens isn’t it ? .

Snoopster:

I hope this doesn’t come off poorly; but my sense is that to the degree that you are reading this situation correctly, your wife doesn’t need to be porked by another man, however much you may want that to be, or think it would help her.

What I’m getting from your post is that she needs to heal from her wounds. This means doing the very difficult yet thoroughly necessary shadow work to process and come to terms with her broken psyche and integrate it into her personality and find peace in herself.

You might also consider whether broaching the cuckoldry thing is in fact triggering her on the unconscious level which may be exacerbating life on the conscious level.

Please explore ways of helping her make peace with her past. My guess is that she likely won’t agree to therapy at this point. But you can still educate yourself in these things, and work on a strategy to redress issues. As things stand, I’m hearing that she must have checked out of the relationship quite some time ago.

And that is truly sad.

I wish you both all the best.

 

[Snoopsissy]

Snoopster:

I hope this doesn’t come off poorly; but my sense is that to the degree that you are reading this situation correctly, your wife doesn’t need to be porked by another man, however much you may want that to be, or think it would help her.

What I’m getting from your post is that she needs to heal from her wounds. This means doing the very difficult yet thoroughly necessary shadow work to process and come to terms with her broken psyche and integrate it into her personality and find peace in herself.

You might also consider whether broaching the cuckoldry thing is in fact triggering her on the unconscious level which may be exacerbating life on the conscious level.

Please explore ways of helping her make peace with her past. My guess is that she likely won’t agree to therapy at this point. But you can still educate yourself in these things, and work on a strategy to redress issues. As things stand, I’m hearing that she must have checked out of the relationship quite some time ago.

And that is truly sad.

I wish you both all the best.

Many thanks for your reply and yes it just may be final as things stand