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I used to go to a distant city to attend a club for transgendered m to f. There I felt kind of free and on the way back home I liked to stop and go into stores but was not 100% confident. I always had a fear of being read or worse a hate crime committed against me, but my desire to be 'out' kept me going. When it was time to go back home I would park at the far corner of this parking lot I knew about that had a lot of trees and bushes where my vehicle was obscured quite well. There I would change my clothes and put on men's sweats and a tee, taking off my pantyhose ,skirt, blouse bra, etc. I cleaned off all my makeup with wash cloths and soap and water I brought with me. Once finished I felt empowered in the sense that I needn't  worry about being discovered. I felt like a caged animal set free. My female persona was my cage. I realized how carefree and natural I felt as a male and how complicated and scary it was as a female.