What does it all mean though

A

AdjectiveNoun123

Active Member
Wife and I have just opened things up. Came clean with one another about our fantasies, and lucky for us, they intersect. I've given her permission to do whatever she wants, from flirting to fucking. She works out of town often so will likely have some opportunities. We're both excited.

I signed up for this forum today in hopes of clarifying some of my feelings though. I do not identify with much of the cuckold mindset as I've seen it depicted in porn, and in this forum. Yes, I fantasize about my wife sucking and getting fucked by other men. Multiple men, even. With huge cocks. That said, I do not get off on humiliation. I do not have a small penis (respectable 6.5 inches, and not thin). And I can get my wife off just fine, she orgasms every time we have sex.

I am even a bit repulsed by the word "cuckold." And I'm embarrassed, probably due to ingrained ideas of "manliness." And again, that embarrassment is not horny for me.

I'm over here wondering what it all means. Why does this turn me on? I'm ready to embrace it but quite confused by it. Here I am in my thirties, having just discovered my kink, my sexuality even.

What does it all mean!?
 
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Pistil said:
The term I have heard is Wittol, it implies sharing your wife without the submissive component
It does describe us
Click to expand...
Depends on the source of the definition. In some circles a wittol knows and is ok of his wife’s ‘indiscretions’ where a cuckold does not have knowledge (i.e. the “clueless cuckold”). But, I thought the same thing.
 
I never have nor will I ever call or consider my husband to fit with the more used modern definition of cuckold. Not the original one either. Cuckold started as a man unaware of his wife"s cheating. It has grown into some kind of monster that doesn't relate what so ever with what many consider it today. There also seems to be a lot of sub classes of it. Too confusing.

Why do you even need a title for yourself? It"s something that you and your wife have chosen to try out and see if it works. A mutual agreement between the two of you. There is nothing that says you have to suddenly have some kind of title that really doesn't have any exact definition. You can easily just be the husband and she the wife.

I guess when there just has to be a title involved, I and my husband use the Hotwife title for me. He has full knowledge and input in all aspects of what I do. Of course, I have full veto rights and he has partial. I don't ever intentionally humiliate him, make him feel the lessor man, or let others do so. The vast majority of my partners have met and know my husband. This is important to the both of us. Like it or not, they need to win him over too. Some have even become somewhat friends with him.

It is unfortunate that one on occasion has to use the word cuckold where it probably doesn't belong just so people can understand what you are trying to say. Perhaps someone could start something that separates all the different sub classes that husbands are referred to and give them a name of their own. How can one say cuckold when one person thinks a husband of a playing wife, another person thinks sissy, another person thinks he likes humiliation, and yet another thinks he is a total submissive slave to his wife? Just makes no sense.

To the OP. You can be whomever you want to be. If you want to refer to yourself as, I'm a carrot,' so be it. Just worry about your partnership and nothing else. One size does not fit all.
 
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I see myself as nothing more than a husband of a hotwife, no label seems to fit me.
I like other men fucking my wife, and she likes to flirt with other men, with the option to have sex with them..
We use the frill of it all to enhance us, for example, she went online last night and chatted to guys about meeting for sex which resulted in us having great sex.
Although her chatting to men improved our sex massively and the aim was to have it motivate us, its pretty much odds on that one or two will get to meet her and fuck her..
I don't see myself as a cuck, but maybe I am, all I know is we are using any tools available to improve our sex life.
I see the whole situation as a win, win, win, she wants to fuck other men, I want men to fuck her, and other men want to fuck my wife.... Labels are not required really ?
 
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Cuckold, wittol, stag --- I call myself a "hotwife husband" - it exactly defines my role without any side notes - sometimes I partake, sometimes I watch, sometimes she solos - I am involved in all of her sexual activities as little as giving her the OK for someone and as deep as fluffing for her
 
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I agree with the above posters, labels are just that ONLY labels, not one fits for all or anyof us.
My hubby considers himself a husband of a hotwife. We don't like the term bull but my lovers (which they are)
As long as your lifestyle works for YOU and your WIFE, who cares about labels????????
 
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Don't worry about labels, just have fun. I love watching other men fuck my wife and I almost always join in the fun. There is never any humiliation involved, we will not play with anyone that does not treat us both with respect. My wife does not want to fuck other men without me present and prefers that I participate as well. I have fucked other wives with my wife's knowledge and consent but she does not want to be present when I play around with other couples and it is not something I do very often.

I don't know what kind of labels other people put on us and don't really care, we are just a couple enjoying the swinging lifestyle!
 
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javaspice said:
I never have nor will I ever call or consider my husband to fit with the more used modern definition of cuckold. Not the original one either. Cuckold started as a man unaware of his wife"s cheating. It has grown into some kind of monster that doesn't relate what so ever with what many consider it today. There also seems to be a lot of sub classes of it. Too confusing.

Why do you even need a title for yourself? It"s something that you and your wife have chosen to try out and see if it works. A mutual agreement between the two of you. There is nothing that says you have to suddenly have some kind of title that really doesn't have any exact definition. You can easily just be the husband and she the wife.

I guess when there just has to be a title involved, I and my husband use the Hotwife title for me. He has full knowledge and input in all aspects of what I do. Of course, I have full veto rights and he has partial. I don't ever intentionally humiliate him, make him feel the lessor man, or let others do so. The vast majority of my partners have met and know my husband. This is important to the both of us. Like it or not, they need to win him over too. Some have even become somewhat friends with him.

It is unfortunate that one on occasion has to use the word cuckold where it probably doesn't belong just so people can understand what you are trying to say. Perhaps someone could start something that separates all the different sub classes that husbands are referred to and give them a name of their own. How can one say cuckold when one person thinks a husband of a playing wife, another person thinks sissy, another person thinks he likes humiliation, and yet another thinks he is a total submissive slave to his wife? Just makes no sense.

To the OP. You can be whomever you want to be. If you want to refer to yourself as, I'm a carrot,' so be it. Just worry about your partnership and nothing else. One size does not fit all.
Click to expand...
Nice way of defining labels, lol. Its true though and I agree there is no need for labels. I have a very good friend (he used to be the 3rd peg in my other relationships, but not yet with my present wife) he beats me at pool, chess and yes sex. His nature is a dominant one yet his wife humiliates him during sex involving others, even to the point of tying him up and only allowing him sex after they guys have finished with her, yet he has this dominant nature. We talk often about it and he just says he gets off on it and calls himself a sissy bull, another label. I have just told him to go on this site and it should help clear a few things up in his own mind. Basically labels are like you say just that and nothing else
By the way your avatar is stunning, is there anywhere you have more photos posted?
 
Sharedwife16 said:
I see myself as nothing more than a husband of a hotwife, no label seems to fit me.
I like other men fucking my wife, and she likes to flirt with other men, with the option to have sex with them..
We use the frill of it all to enhance us, for example, she went online last night and chatted to guys about meeting for sex which resulted in us having great sex.
Although her chatting to men improved our sex massively and the aim was to have it motivate us, its pretty much odds on that one or two will get to meet her and fuck her..
I don't see myself as a cuck, but maybe I am, all I know is we are using any tools available to improve our sex life.
I see the whole situation as a win, win, win, she wants to fuck other men, I want men to fuck her, and other men want to fuck my wife.... Labels are not required really ?
Click to expand...
I agree! Unnecessary to label! Do what makes you both happy
 
AdjectiveNoun123 said:
Wife and I have just opened things up. Came clean with one another about our fantasies, and lucky for us, they intersect. I've given her permission to do whatever she wants, from flirting to fucking. She works out of town often so will likely have some opportunities. We're both excited.

I signed up for this forum today in hopes of clarifying some of my feelings though. I do not identify with much of the cuckold mindset as I've seen it depicted in porn, and in this forum. Yes, I fantasize about my wife sucking and getting fucked by other men. Multiple men, even. With huge cocks. That said, I do not get off on humiliation. I do not have a small penis (respectable 6.5 inches, and not thin). And I can get my wife off just fine, she orgasms every time we have sex.

I am even a bit repulsed by the word "cuckold." And I'm embarrassed, probably due to ingrained ideas of "manliness." And again, that embarrassment is not horny for me.

I'm over here wondering what it all means. Why does this turn me on? I'm ready to embrace it but quite confused by it. Here I am in my thirties, having just discovered my kink, my sexuality even.

What does it all mean!?
Click to expand...
this is so similar to my condition,its like you read my mind.
 
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I'm not into humiliation AND I always want to participate. I would never go for having her date guys without me present.
What's the correct description for that? Stag? Wittol? Controling Asshole? 😛
 
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