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That’s where I’m at now.  My first wife was wild and carefree (still great friends).  My wife today slips up when she’s had a few drinks.  Example…. We were traveling last Saturday to some friends a couple hours north.  We all went out and my wife got tipsy.  When I saw we were gonna ...... on an air mattress… I jokingly said do you wanna have sex.  Her response was with who… I said whomever you want.  She said she had a few in mind.  The next day she said she had no memory of telling me that.  It almost happened once…(her idea).  Then she backed out and said she could never do it.  So I know the thoughts are there… just have to groom them.