I finally confessed to wife

layla

Male
Hello,

I'm writing this with mixed emotions, though mostly positive. My wife and I have faced some challenges recently, and at one point, we considered parting ways. However, we came to realize just how deeply we love each other. In the midst of everything, I found the courage to express things I had kept to myself. One of the things I shared was a fantasy I've had about a threesome involving another man. I didn't want to hide this from her, as honesty is vital in our relationship.

Her initial reaction was one of offense, though she did thank me for being open with her. However, she made it clear that she would never consider such an experience, as she doesn't understand why people engage in that kind of activity. The conversation was an emotional rollercoaster for me. When I brought up the idea of role-playing, she agreed, which gave me hope.

Now, I really want to continue exploring this and perhaps bring my fantasies into reality, but I'm unsure how to proceed. I'd appreciate any advice on how to approach this situation.
 
Role play is a good way to start but take it slow and gage her reactions. Dont go straight to the sex bit. Start with 2 men massaging her or both nipples sucked, gage her reaction and go from there.
If she gets into then slowly up the scenario but if her reaction is not good then drop it and stick with the fantasy or you will lose her. It her call if she wants another man in her bed.
 
Hello,

I'm writing this with mixed emotions, though mostly positive. My wife and I have faced some challenges recently, and at one point, we considered parting ways. However, we came to realize just how deeply we love each other. In the midst of everything, I found the courage to express things I had kept to myself. One of the things I shared was a fantasy I've had about a threesome involving another man. I didn't want to hide this from her, as honesty is vital in our relationship.

Her initial reaction was one of offense, though she did thank me for being open with her. However, she made it clear that she would never consider such an experience, as she doesn't understand why people engage in that kind of activity. The conversation was an emotional rollercoaster for me. When I brought up the idea of role-playing, she agreed, which gave me hope.

Now, I really want to continue exploring this and perhaps bring my fantasies into reality, but I'm unsure how to proceed. I'd appreciate any advice on how to approach this situation.
Do you use sex toy? If not introduce a decent size dildo and name it .. bring him into your foreplay
 
Hello,

I'm writing this with mixed emotions, though mostly positive. My wife and I have faced some challenges recently, and at one point, we considered parting ways. However, we came to realize just how deeply we love each other. In the midst of everything, I found the courage to express things I had kept to myself. One of the things I shared was a fantasy I've had about a threesome involving another man. I didn't want to hide this from her, as honesty is vital in our relationship.

Her initial reaction was one of offense, though she did thank me for being open with her. However, she made it clear that she would never consider such an experience, as she doesn't understand why people engage in that kind of activity. The conversation was an emotional rollercoaster for me. When I brought up the idea of role-playing, she agreed, which gave me hope.

Now, I really want to continue exploring this and perhaps bring my fantasies into reality, but I'm unsure how to proceed. I'd appreciate any advice on how to approach this situation.
Congrats for your courage. Would know more when you have news
 
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You took the biggest step. Take thing as they come for now. She will build on the role play. More comfortable she feels the more the idea will grow in her mind.
Work on some her fantasies in the meantime.

Remember doesn't matter you can go from 0 to 120 it matters how well u handle the ride.
So the more she enjoys working up to it the more natural it will feel when she gets there
 
You took the biggest step. Take thing as they come for now. She will build on the role play. More comfortable she feels the more the idea will grow in her mind.
Work on some her fantasies in the meantime.

Remember doesn't matter you can go from 0 to 120 it matters how well u handle the ride.
So the more she enjoys working up to it the more natural it will feel when she gets there
Could you suggest any role play ideas or suggestions to play together? Thank you!
 
Honesty, in a relationship, has its limits. All virtues taken to an extreme, become vices, so Aristotle informed us over 2,000 years ago. Do you tell you think she looks fat? I hope not.

A good rule is to never mention any sexual topic unless she is already deep into sexual bliss. Why? Apparently, that part of our brain that handles disgust is also the same part that deals with sexual desire. Evidence is found that when turned-on, we are less sensitive to the disgusting. (Imagine how bad cave men and women smelled. Hence the need to shut off the disgust circuit to further the species.) Inversely, when disgusted, we cannot be made lustful. Moreover, when we are sexually excited, we are less rational, otherwise there would be far fewer one-night stands and affairs. This dual purpose working also explains why so many sex fetishes are based on the disgusting, such as coprophilia and mutilation fetishes (acrotomophilia ). A miswiring of sorts, no doubt.

Revealing your fantasy to your wife was a mistake, as you are (at least in her mind) responsible for your fantasies. Dreams, on the other hand, are things that happen to you, much like being rained upon and slipping on the wet sidewalk. Not your fault. You should have recast your fantasy as a weird dream you had. And when you reveal your "dream," after you had nearly brought her to orgasm, you should only outline it briefly and let it drop away. Women are not men. Where a man might need five minutes to before being willing to fuck a strange woman; a woman might need five days, if not five months... (In general, if you know that someone wants to have sex with you, you will feel that attraction much like the planets feel the sun's gravity. Given enough time—and some opportunity—you two will have sex.) In other words, let your "dream" simmer in the back of her mind.

If you are up to it, you might be able to explain away your fantasy as the result of that crazy dream you had. Although it was insane and unworthy of a loving couple, the dream strangely made some sense while dreaming it.

Most men do not know how to spell "subtle," i.e. making use of clever and indirect methods to achieve something, let alone how to it or be it.
 
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Honesty, in a relationship, has its limits. All virtues taken to an extreme, become vices, so Aristotle informed us over 2,000 years ago. Do you tell you think she looks fat? I hope not.

A good rule is to never mention any sexual topic unless she is already deep into sexual bliss. Why? Apparently, that part of our brain that handles disgust is also the same part that deals with sexual desire. Evidence is found that when turned-on, we are less sensitive to the disgusting. (Imagine how bad cave men and women smelled. Hence the need to shut off the disgust circuit to further the species.) Inversely, when disgusted, we cannot be made lustful. Moreover, when we are sexually excited, we are less rational, otherwise there would be far fewer one-night stands and affairs. This dual purpose working also explains why so many sex fetishes are based on the disgusting, such as coprophilia and mutilation fetishes (acrotomophilia ). A miswiring of sorts, no doubt.

Revealing your fantasy to your wife was a mistake, as you are (at least in her mind) responsible for your fantasies. Dreams, on the other hand, are things that happen to you, much like being rained upon and slipping on the wet sidewalk. Not your fault. You should have recast your fantasy as a weird dream you had. And when you reveal your "dream," after you had nearly brought her to orgasm, you should only outline it briefly and let it drop away. Women are not men. Where a man might need five minutes to before being willing to fuck a strange woman; a woman might need five days, if not five months... (In general, if you know that someone wants to have sex with you, you will feel that attraction much like the planets feel the sun's gravity. Given enough time—and some opportunity—you two will have sex.) In other words, let your "dream" simmer in the back of her mind.

If you are up to it, you might be able to explain away your fantasy as the result of that crazy dream you had. Although it was insane and unworthy of a loving couple, the dream strangely made some sense while dreaming it.

Most men do not know how to spell "subtle," i.e. making use of clever and indirect methods to achieve something, let alone how to it or be it.
Great perspective! Could you write me more details about how can I describe a dream? Thank you 🙂
 
Here we go:


I saved the best for last:

 
Honesty, in a relationship, has its limits. All virtues taken to an extreme, become vices, so Aristotle informed us over 2,000 years ago. Do you tell you think she looks fat? I hope not.

A good rule is to never mention any sexual topic unless she is already deep into sexual bliss. Why? Apparently, that part of our brain that handles disgust is also the same part that deals with sexual desire. Evidence is found that when turned-on, we are less sensitive to the disgusting. (Imagine how bad cave men and women smelled. Hence the need to shut off the disgust circuit to further the species.) Inversely, when disgusted, we cannot be made lustful. Moreover, when we are sexually excited, we are less rational, otherwise there would be far fewer one-night stands and affairs. This dual purpose working also explains why so many sex fetishes are based on the disgusting, such as coprophilia and mutilation fetishes (acrotomophilia ). A miswiring of sorts, no doubt.

Revealing your fantasy to your wife was a mistake, as you are (at least in her mind) responsible for your fantasies. Dreams, on the other hand, are things that happen to you, much like being rained upon and slipping on the wet sidewalk. Not your fault. You should have recast your fantasy as a weird dream you had. And when you reveal your "dream," after you had nearly brought her to orgasm, you should only outline it briefly and let it drop away. Women are not men. Where a man might need five minutes to before being willing to fuck a strange woman; a woman might need five days, if not five months... (In general, if you know that someone wants to have sex with you, you will feel that attraction much like the planets feel the sun's gravity. Given enough time—and some opportunity—you two will have sex.) In other words, let your "dream" simmer in the back of her mind.

If you are up to it, you might be able to explain away your fantasy as the result of that crazy dream you had. Although it was insane and unworthy of a loving couple, the dream strangely made some sense while dreaming it.

Most men do not know how to spell "subtle," i.e. making use of clever and indirect methods to achieve something, let alone how to it or be it.
It's a really good point. Anyway, somewhere at the journey, you need to assume and confess to your wife your fantasy. Of course it's easier if you give her some subtle clouds about it and, if she is a good detective as most woman are 😂, she already would know what you are confessing. More or less my case.
 
Hello,

I'm writing this with mixed emotions, though mostly positive. My wife and I have faced some challenges recently, and at one point, we considered parting ways. However, we came to realize just how deeply we love each other. In the midst of everything, I found the courage to express things I had kept to myself. One of the things I shared was a fantasy I've had about a threesome involving another man. I didn't want to hide this from her, as honesty is vital in our relationship.

Her initial reaction was one of offense, though she did thank me for being open with her. However, she made it clear that she would never consider such an experience, as she doesn't understand why people engage in that kind of activity. The conversation was an emotional rollercoaster for me. When I brought up the idea of role-playing, she agreed, which gave me hope.

Now, I really want to continue exploring this and perhaps bring my fantasies into reality, but I'm unsure how to proceed. I'd appreciate any advice on how to approach this situation.
My advice would be if she made it absolutely clear that she would never consider a threesome with another guy be very cautious about guiding her near or in that direction as it could cause harm. If she is really not into it there is no point in talking her into something she is not comfortable with. Talk to her and find things that she is ok with that she likes, these things will be 100 times more enjoyable because you will both like them. Role play sounds like much fun, enjoy.