You make an excellent point here, in my view. I think the guys are sometimes too humiliated by the enormity of it all to 'fess up. When my wife told me she'd fallen in love with a man she was having sex with (in our home as well as while traveling for work) it scared the hell out of me until she reassured me there was no threat to our marriage. She was no longer having sex with him in the extra bedroom, - she was having sex with him in our bed. That was when I began to experience fear and I shared that concern with her. She convinced me that she could love two men and make it all work. And she did. For three years, until his wife grew uncomfortable after a pregnancy scare. To this day, I really appreciate how my wife didn't throw it all back in my face by saying "you asked for this, and now you don't want it?" We are still married and we still marvel at how hot the sex was during those three years.
