Gloveguy, I can hugely identify with your feelings of jealousy at the motional attachment your wife has formed with this guy. My wife's had relationships with a number of guys, but most of them have been very 'casual' and spontaneous one-off physical sexual encounters - my feelings on those occasions have been a mixture of jealousy and arousal, but with the emphasis tipped very much towards the arousal side.
One exception was when we were on a touring holiday in Greece. My wife became very friendly with a younger guy who was traveling alone, and who shared many of her interests about history and archaeology. Whenever we stopped at a new archaeological site she would seek him out and walk around with him, chatting animatedly about the things they were looking at. She even started sitting next to him instead of me on the coach - and as the week went on I noticed her wearing more and more skimpy and revealing clothing around him. Things came to a head when we had a 'beach' day and he came and sat down beside my wife, who was sunbathing topless, and they spent the whole time chatting and laughing together. I was so jealous of the time they were spending together, and how they looked at each other - and how she encouraged him to look at her.
When, two nights before the end of the holiday, they ended up going skinny-dipping together, and then came back to our room to finally satisfy their physical desire, it was almost a relief - the unresolved sexual tension between them had been becoming unbearable!
Once we got home, I think there were a couple of text message exchanged between them, but then one of both seems to have lost interest.
However, now she's started a lengthy text exchange with an old boyfriend of hers from college days, who got back in touch via Facebook. They seem to exchange messages several times, a day, and I often find her giggling or blushing over something he's written - if I ask what she's laughing at, she just says 'oh, nothing - in-joke you wouldn't understand'. They haven't met up yet, although I believe they've talked about it. And once again, it's their emotional connection and the time and attention she spends on him that's driving me wild with jealousy, although thinking about them together - both in the past and potentially in the future - is also deliciously agonising!
